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News of the Weird, 2009

DocTee Dec 31 2008 09:02 PM

Dick grabbed by balls: http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/crime/ ... ruder.kptv

soupcan Jan 06 2009 10:21 AM

[url=http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0106091vail1.html]thesmokinggun.com[/url] Skier Suffers Exposure Man left dangling upside down, pantsless after Vail lift mishap JANUARY 6--In a bizarre incident that will surely lead to litigation (or an out-of-court settlement), a skier at Colorado's ritzy Vail resort was left dangling upside down and pantsless from a chairlift last Friday morning. The January 2 mishap apparently occurred after the male skier and a child boarded a high-speed lift in Vail's Blue Sky Basin. It appears that the chairlift's fold-down seat was somehow not in the lowered position, which caused the man to partially fall through the resulting gap. His right ski got jammed in the ascending chairlift, and that kept him upended since his boot never dislodged from its binding. As seen in the photos on the following pages (which were snapped by fellow skiers), the Skyline Express lift was stopped shortly after the pair's botched 10:30 AM boarding resulted in the man dangling from the lift. The exposed skier was stuck for about 15 minutes before Vail personnel backed the lift up and successfully dislodged the unidentified man from the four-seat chair.

Edgy DC Jan 06 2009 10:23 AM

Way to go, shutterbugs.

batmagadanleadoff Jan 06 2009 10:23 AM

I'll bet that that guy had some real shrinkage going on.

Frayed Knot Jan 06 2009 11:03 AM

Hate when that happens.

Edgy DC Jan 06 2009 11:10 AM Edited 1 time(s), most recently on Jan 06 2009 11:27 AM

Somebody got to employ the rarely used "Remove Anis" Toggle in Photoshop.

metsmarathon Jan 06 2009 11:20 AM

that looks like as good a reason as any to wear conventional undies under your long underwear...

RealityChuck Jan 06 2009 12:42 PM

From http://wnyt.com/article/stories/S729816.shtml?cat=10114 ]Dad, son accused of stealing tombstones COLONIE - A local father and son are locked in jail after being accused of a most unusual crime. Police say they took half a dozen unmarked tombstones, altogether weighing about a ton. This is a first for Colonie police and the granite company owner. Before this weekend there hadn't been a problem with the heavy grave markers disappearing. There are several dozen tombstones standing outside at Stefanazzi and Spargo Granite Company on Route 9 in Colonie. Even the smallest weigh 300 pounds. The larger markers approach one ton. That sheer tonnage makes them items not very likely to be stolen -- even if there was a use for them other than marking someone's grave, which there really isn't. "That's what they're used for, memorials, and unless you have an absolute purpose for them in our industry, I have no idea or market, I have no idea why anybody would ever steal them," owner Richard Stefanazzi said. Stefanazzi got a call a little bit after midnight Sunday from police. A neighbor had spotted two men loading tombstones onto their rental truck and got suspicious. Police stopped the pair carting off six of the smaller stones -- keeping in mind that still checks in at about a ton of granite -- and slapped on the cuffs. "Really can't do anything else with it because it's already cut for a tombstone. So what their intentions were they didn't share with us, but it's a first for me because it seems like it's a narrow opportunity to get rid of something like that after you take it," Detective Lt. John Van Alstyne said. Under arrest are 35-year-old Demetrius Lanier of Limerick Drive in Albany and his 19-year-old son Shateek Lanier from 10th Street in Troy. There are no other reports of missing tombstones. So apparently the Laniers were trying something new. Their guilt or innocence yet to be established. The big question remains unanswered -- what were the thieves planning to do with the tombstones? There really isn't any other use for them and there isn't much of a market in fencing hot grave markers. So far police say their suspects aren't offering any explanation.

themetfairy Jan 06 2009 03:18 PM

[url=http://www.fairfield-echo.com/n/content/oh/story/news/local/2009/01/06/op010909policewebmom.html:1l1qf3gl]Mother out with her young kids shoplifts a parenting book[/url:1l1qf3gl]

A Boy Named Seo Jan 06 2009 03:39 PM

="themetfairy":1lpqkabw][url=http://www.fairfield-echo.com/n/content/oh/story/news/local/2009/01/06/op010909policewebmom.html:1lpqkabw]Mother out with her young kids shoplifts a parenting book[/url:1lpqkabw][/quote:1lpqkabw] That's sorta sad. I think I wanna buy the book for her. Centerfield Jan 06 2009 04:30 PM ="soupcan"][url=http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0106091vail1.html]thesmokinggun.com[/url] Skier Suffers Exposure Man left dangling upside down, pantsless after Vail lift mishap JANUARY 6--In a bizarre incident that will surely lead to litigation (or an out-of-court settlement), a skier at Colorado's ritzy Vail resort was left dangling upside down and pantsless from a chairlift last Friday morning. The January 2 mishap apparently occurred after the male skier and a child boarded a high-speed lift in Vail's Blue Sky Basin. It appears that the chairlift's fold-down seat was somehow not in the lowered position, which caused the man to partially fall through the resulting gap. His right ski got jammed in the ascending chairlift, and that kept him upended since his boot never dislodged from its binding. As seen in the photos on the following pages (which were snapped by fellow skiers), the Skyline Express lift was stopped shortly after the pair's botched 10:30 AM boarding resulted in the man dangling from the lift. The exposed skier was stuck for about 15 minutes before Vail personnel backed the lift up and successfully dislodged the unidentified man from the four-seat chair. I can see the commercial now. VANDALAY BINDINGS We stay clamped even when you're hanging upside down bare-assed from one leg off a ski lift!!!