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It Wasn't Me

Edgy DC Mar 25 2009 07:12 AM

So, I get on the elevator this morn, and somebody has apparently dropped a chocolate cupcake. I know this from the thick brown smudge on the floor. I'm able to distinguish it from the other kind of thick brown smudge because of the faint but unmistakeable residue of colored sprinkles. At least, I think it's unmistakeable. But I'm going to the 12th floor, and all the lazy Bureau of Land Managment people getting on and off in between aren't so sure. The routine is the same at every floor. <blockquote>Door opens. Passenger looks at the cupcake. Passenger looks at me. Looks at one and the other more rapidly. Gives me a longer look to size me up and begins to step backwards to wait for another elevator. I say, "Oh, stop, it's a stupid cupcake and it's not even mine."</blockquote>There must've been four peeps this morning to whom I had to deny pooping on the elevator and letting it roll down my leg. What do I look like? I should have just told them Rumsfeld did it.

Fman99 Mar 25 2009 07:17 AM Re: It Wasn't Me

="Edgy DC"]So, I get on the elevator this morn, and somebody has apparently dropped a chocolate cupcake. I know this from the thick brown smudge on the floor. I'm able to distinguish it from the other kind of thick brown smudge because of the faint but unmistakeable residue of colored sprinkles. At least, I think it's unmistakeable. But I'm going to the 12th floor, and all the lazy Bureau of Land Managment people getting on and off in between aren't so sure. The routine is the same at every floor. <blockquote>Door opens. Passenger looks at the cupcake. Passenger looks at me. Looks at one and the other more rapidly. Gives me a longer look to size me up and begins to step backwards to wait for another elevator. I say, "Oh, stop, it's a stupid cupcake and it's not even mine."</blockquote>There must've been four peeps this morning to whom I had to deny pooping on the elevator and letting it roll down my leg. What do I look like? I should have just told them Rumsfeld did it. I wonder if DJ Chunky left that behind. Edgy, you rock. I don't care if you did poop in an elevator.

metirish Mar 25 2009 07:19 AM

You'll never get a promotion now.

MFS62 Mar 25 2009 07:26 AM

Deny it all you want. They're checking the elevator security tapes now. Sooner or later, you'll have to 'fess up. Its like a tv cop show. At the end of the show, the person who did it had a speaking part somewhere during the episode. If you had said nothing, we could be sure you didn't do it. But since you posted this, well ..... Later

John Cougar Lunchbucket Mar 25 2009 07:35 AM

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Benjamin Grimm Mar 25 2009 08:39 AM

Hmmm... I've never wondered this before, but perhaps sprinkles have the same properties as corn when it comes to presence in poop. I tend to avoid sprinkles, so I don't know for sure. Maybe I should feed some sprinkles to my dog.

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr Mar 25 2009 02:51 PM

="metirish":2krjx400]You'll never get a promotion now.[/quote:2krjx400] I don't know, perhaps they'll appreciate the brown-nos-- -Thanks, You've Been Great/Stick Around For Paula Poundstone G-Fafif Mar 25 2009 03:51 PM Common [url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQ4axo9rmJY:21lbi8cw]alibi[/url:21lbi8cw].