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Friday; 7:10 (SNY & Yank-Jazeera)
Livan Hernandez vs Joba Chamberlain
In what might make for a good sumo match, we’ll get 600 pounds of fun as Livan the Large faces off against Joba the Fat
Joba tends to give up runs early and run up pitch counts like he runs up the ‘X Billion Sold’ sign at his hometown McDonalds before settling in as the game goes on. He no longer seems to get as tired during games possibly because he's cut down his fist pumps to only after swinging strikes now instead of swinging and called strikes.
Saturday; 4:10 (FOX Network game for youse outta-towners)
The Masked Avenger vs Pettitte
Who’s starting for the Mets? Maybe Figueroa? Stokes? Fernando Neise? Or maybe me, I’m waiting by the phone.
Pettitte is still OK although maintains his decade-plus streak of getting a far better record than he deserves (6 - 2; 4.22 ERA; 1.527 WHiP)
Sunday; 1:10 (SNY & Yank-Jazeera)
Johan Santana vs AJ Burnett
Johan the Merely Human (lately) faces the one-time NYM farmhand (Baseball-Refernce lists no full name. Do you suppose he was actually christened A.J.?)
Burnett (4 - 3; 4.89; 1.48) is the one guy who most exemplifies the 1980s MFY FA. Think about it; they pay a talented though hardly great pitcher who’s both oft-injured and erratic to top-shelf money and then wonder why they’re cursed when he turns out to be either injured or (in this case) erratic. He’ll mix in a good outing with several bad ones and is coming off his Tuesday start in Boston where he gave up 5 runs (3 earned) on 5 hits & 5 BBs while not getting out of the 3rd inning.
Where: The new $1.5 billion HR palace in the Bronx that they built next door to the old one they haven’t gotten around to taking down yet and on top of the parkland they may or may not get around to replacing depending on how they feel and fuck you Mr. Assemblyman but it’s none of your damn businiess when or if we replace it or how we arrived at the value of the land you handed us.
Yeah, and about those HRs. Not only is the park itself near the pace for all-time HRs given up in a season and in a class by itself when it comes to sea-level HRs, but virtually every regular is on pace for, or at least close to, a personal record for HRs, and that includes the ones who have missed time for injury and/or are part-time platoons. Only ARod (missed 1/2 season so far) and Matsui (old, infirm and near death) aren’t particularly close.
Teixeira: Current = 19 ; Projected = 51; Pers Best = 43
Cano: 9; 24; 19
Jeter: 8; 22; 24
ARod: 8; 22; 58
Swisher: 12; 32; 35
Cabrera: 6; 16; 8
Damon: 13; 35; 24
Posada: 9; 24; 30
Matsui: 8; 22; 31
Position players:
You guys basically know the usual cast of characters.
* FA Teixeira at 1B is a new MFY. He still looks like a dork and the Giambi contract looked good at this point too. But, after a slow start, he's been as good as any FA signee not named Ibanez.
* 2B - SS - 3B = Cano - Jeter - Rodriguez
* Nick Swisher is getting the bulk of time in RF. Got off to a hot start but cooled off after that. Low BA, good power and takes his walks. OK in the OF but not great.
* CF is getting split between Melky Cabrera & Brett Gardener. Gardener won the job in ST then lost it by not hitting. He's the better speed & glove man.
* Damon mans LF these days. Which means not only should Razor Shines send runners on balls hit to left but that he himself could probably beat most of the throws
* Matsui is strictly a DH these days, and a mediocre one at that.
Pitching: Well, it’s not very good -- leading the AL is HRs allowed, 2nd in most BBs, 3rd highest R/G, and a 10th-best WHiP. Yeah the stadium has something to do with that just like it does the hitting, but you know how it is, you just don’t get as much for your $37 billion as you used to.
Pen: Basically it’s Mariano and 6 guys named Jose.
- Jose Veras (6.56 ERA & 1.437 WHiP) & Alfredo Acevez (2.55; 1.135) seem to be the closest thing to set-up men for Mariano but there's no specific order.
- Phil Coke is the only LHP (4.01; 1.135) -- and he'll have to change his name to Pepsi when the series switches to CitiField
- Phil Hughes is in the pen these days as long as the Yanx pretend to believe in the Awsoma starting power of Chien-Ming Wang
- David Robertson and, playing the role of veteran long man, Brent Tomko represent the rarely used back of the pen
Bench: Barely breathing:
Francisco Cervelli backs up Posada - although Dumbo-ears sat Thursday night so I suspect he’ll catch (or DH) all three games.
Francisco Pena: Glove-first backup infielder
Angel Berroa : One-time AL RoY (2003 KC) has a whopping total of 15 ABs this year (2 singles) and no discernable role whatsoever.
Plus whichever CFer doesn’t start (Cabrera or Gardener)
DL:
Nady - Cody Ransom - Damaso Marte - Jose Molina - Brian Bruney (who they're pretending is the shut-down set-up man they're missing)
Weather: I’ve researched this thoroughly while checking all the latest info and, yes, there will be weather this weekend.
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