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Latter-Day R&B Classick

1) ... objectively speaking, excellence.

0 votes

2) ... objectively speaking, goodness.

0 votes

3) ... objectively speaking, averageness.

2 votes

4) ... objectively speaking, badness.

2 votes

5) ... objectively speaking, excrement.

3 votes

Edgy DC Jul 22 2010 02:50 PM

My wife gets called to play music at a funeral yesterday and she sends them a list (extensive) of appropriate music. She deals with these families a lot and her first observation was that the daughter didn't seem particuarly distressed with her Mom's passing. Well, apparently, they have a dramatic streak. Not only do they want a family member to sing (always fraught with peril, but you adapt and make the best of the situation) but they come back today asking if she can perform "I Believe I Can Fly." She can, but... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=16FdJrrAWSo When answering this poll, please put aside the degradation of the effect that inevitably results from overplay.

cooby Jul 22 2010 03:08 PM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

I can't hear anything. I know the song though and it ranks right up there with Whitney for me. Fixed it. Forgot I muted this last night.

Edgy DC Jul 22 2010 06:51 PM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

[quote="cooby"]I can't hear anything. I know the song though and it ranks right up there with Whitney for me.

That's bad or good?

I find it has more melody than most contemporary R&B, and that's good, but that's a low low standard. Lyrically, I have a smidge of trouble getting past that deadly opening couplet --- seemingly written with the intent to come around and bite him in the ass.

I used to think that I could not go on
And life was nothing but an awful song

The Second Spitter Jul 22 2010 08:47 PM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

Edgy DC Jul 22 2010 09:22 PM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

First appearing on the soundtrack of the landmark cinema event that was Space Jam.

The Second Spitter Jul 23 2010 06:01 AM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

We played "The Carnival is Over" by the Seekers at my father's funeral by his own request, which is an awesome funeral song. At my gf's funeral her parents chose "Baba O'Reilly" which I thought was really inappropriate -- that was once one of my favorite songs, but I can't stand it anymore, not because I associate it with her funeral, but because I thought it was so inappropriate for it.

John Cougar Lunchbucket Jul 23 2010 07:11 AM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

It starts out okay as a ballad, but way, WAY overdone at the end. Not my cup of meat.

Edgy DC Jul 23 2010 07:25 AM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

Yeah, the missus hated it, but found it easy enough. She naturally finds it hard to say no to the bereaved and wishes a middleman (or the celebrant priest) was available to counsel them away the from (or forbid) the Space Jam-themed funeral. I find it average (or even above) by R&B standards, but most of that genre leaves me completely puzzled as to how it ever sees the light of day. Before she leaves for the funeral this morning, she asks me, "So, who is this R. Kelly?" and I had to carefully skirt the child-pornographer angle. Funerals are a character-building, though. If she can get through singing this sort of stuff in a church, she can pull off almost anything.

Edgy DC Jul 23 2010 07:28 AM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

[quote="John Cougar Lunchbucket"]It starts out okay as a ballad, but way, WAY overdone at the end.

What she wrote me about the ending while learning it yesterday:

"it modulates and there is a choir and it gets suckier."

You have to go back to Lincoln to find truer words ever spoken.

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr Jul 23 2010 08:25 AM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

It starts out okay as a ballad, but way, WAY overdone at the end. You could say this about most every R. Kelly song ever written. How you feel about "overdone" and how forgiving you are about terrible, tossed-off lyrics about fucking-- hard fucking, long fucking, slow fucking, car fucking-- pretty much tells you how you feel about R. Kelly. "Trapped in the Closet," however, is gloriously terrible kitsch. (Sample lyric: "I tried my best quickly to put it on vi-i-bra-ate...") Funerals are a character-building, though. If she can get through singing this sort of stuff in a church, she can pull off almost anything. Wait... she's singing this today? I thought she was... I don't know, playing pianee or organ or farfisa or something.

Edgy DC Jul 23 2010 09:03 AM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

Um, yeeeeah. Piano and vocals. She should be getting to it any moment now. I'm a little scared about picking up the phone. Maybe if it works out well, she'll do "Trapped in a Closet" as a postlude.

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr Jul 23 2010 09:11 AM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

Oh. Oh, that's rough. You can play a detached, businesslike piano... but you have to sell vocals.

Edgy DC Jul 23 2010 09:22 AM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

Yup. She survived. She's not confident the check will clear, but she made it. Did the modulation at the end, also. But no hair flips, and, um, no choirs.

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr Jul 23 2010 09:29 AM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

No choir? COME ON! Tell me she at least stood up and spread her arms, Titanic-style.

Centerfield Jul 23 2010 09:36 AM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

And played the piano with what? Her feet?

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr Jul 23 2010 09:42 AM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

If you believe in yourself enough, CF, you can do anything. Geez-- were we listening to two different songs?

Centerfield Jul 23 2010 10:12 AM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

My mistake. Getting back to funeral music, one of the most touching things I've ever seen was at my friend's father's funeral. I hardly knew the guy (only met on a number of occasions) so I didn't think it would be all that difficult an experience for me (just wanted to give my friend some support). But then my friend's father's lifelong buddy got up with a ukelele and sang "Aloha-Oe". It was incredible. I was a mess.

G-Fafif Jul 23 2010 02:01 PM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

Hope it comforted the family and that the check clears. Jill Sobule's lyrics to "One of These Days" includes One of these days I'm gonna touch the sky Like that awful song "I Believe I Can Fly" I believe I can fly

Fman99 Jul 23 2010 05:32 PM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

Shite.

cooby Jul 23 2010 08:47 PM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

[quote="Edgy DC":18oqvtr3][quote="cooby":18oqvtr3]I can't hear anything. I know the song though and it ranks right up there with Whitney for me.[/quote:18oqvtr3] That's bad or good? ][/quote:18oqvtr3] Bad, bad, bad. BTW, Edgy do you remember what I told you I want for my funeral song?

Edgy DC Jul 23 2010 09:28 PM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

Sure, but you better write it down, as I don't think I'll be the first one they call.

cooby Jul 23 2010 09:30 PM Re: Latter-Day R&B Classick

Gonna put it in my will, and I have a copy sitting on my dressing table, all ready to go.