Forum Home

Master Index of Archived Threads


Mazzone to O's?

Johnny Dickshot
Oct 19 2005 11:56 PM

Five bucks to the first guy who posts the Mazzilli & Mazzone poem in its entirety.

Mazzone likely leaving Braves for O's


Ken Rosenthal / FOXSports.com
Posted: 3 hours ago

Braves pitching coach Leo Mazzone appears to be heading to the AL East, but not for the job he was widely expected to take.

FOXSports.com has learned that Mazzone likely will join the Orioles as the team's pitching coach after his talks with the Yankees broke down Wednesday.

Mazzone is expected to receive a three-year contract with the Orioles, matching the length of new manager Sam Perlozzo's deal. Mazzone and Perlozzo are long-time friends, having grown up together in Cumberland, Md.

The Orioles already have a well-regarded pitching coach, Ray Miller. But Miller is recovering from surgery to remove an aneurysm and reportedly had given the O's his blessing to hire another pitching coach.

Mazzone is widely credited with helping develop the sterling pitching staffs the Braves have enjoyed over the last 15 years — a run that has coincided with the team's 14 consecutive division championships.

According to a report on Newsday's web site, the Yankees' list of candidates to replace Mel Stottlemyre now includes Dave Righetti of the Giants, Don Cooper of the White Sox and former pitcher Ron Guidry, who most recently has been a spring training instructor.

metirish
Oct 20 2005 12:06 AM

Well you need pitchers, you can't make chicken salad out of chicken shit...he'll have it all to do...I like this though.

Valadius
Oct 20 2005 01:25 AM

IT HAS BEGUN!!!

At long last, the Braves dynasty will crumble without Ol' Rocking Chair.

smg58
Oct 20 2005 09:13 AM

I'm surprised the Braves didn't make much of an effort to hold on to him. As usual, though, I'll refrain from prematurely declaring an end to the Braves run of titles.

Frayed Knot
Oct 20 2005 09:37 AM

I try not to place too much stock in the value of coaches (although pitching coaches certainly have more influence than others) but, assuming this goes through, it's tough not to look at this as a win/win for Met fans:
He not only takes a bullet away from the Braves and does NOT hand it to the Yanx but he specifically hands it to one of their opposition.

Not surprising that things didn't work out w/the Yanx. I think what he had with Atlanta was as a major player of a system-wide philosophy of instruction, strategy and development; similar to what the Mets envision for Peterson. With the Yanx, and all the various minions trying to poke their noses into everywhere just so others won't get the credit, he'd have been lucky to be the first voice that his immediate staff listened to.

sharpie
Oct 20 2005 09:42 AM

Orioles pitching has been suspect for some time now. Hard to figure the Braves not holding onto him, though.

TheOldMole
Oct 20 2005 09:44 AM

Fred and Omar
Tryin' to sign Nomar
Leave the second division behind

Joe and Brian
They were still a-tryin'
A pitching coach they needed to find

Mazzone and Mazzilli
Gettin' kinda silly
In Baltimore you know where that's at
And nothin's gettin' fat except George's ass

Edgy DC
Oct 20 2005 10:06 AM

The name of original poem by Demeter v. Phoebus was "I Hate One of Them More Than the Other."

I couldn't find it. I found instead the thread where Centerfield throws in the towel in the Armando wars. It's also the thread that gave the CPF its unofficial subtitle.

Centerfield
Oct 20 2005 10:45 AM

Let's wipe the slate clean...let's get another guy in here. More blown saves seem a small price to pay...

There you have it. Braden Looper...all my fault. Sorry guys.

ScarletKnight41
Oct 20 2005 10:50 AM

]THE CRANE POOL FORUM: For Mets' Fans Who Hate Mets' Fans


Brilliant!

Edgy DC
Oct 20 2005 10:53 AM

Yeah, let's just start a new loop in the great cycle of ignorance. Good call. Centerfield.

MFS62
Oct 20 2005 11:28 AM

Mole, and

In the Yank dugout Girardi sat
tellin’ joe who to send up for the next at bat
Giambi, like McGwire needs artificial fire
The “S” word, you know where that's at
And nothin's gettin' fat except George's ass

Later

Johnny Dickshot
Oct 20 2005 11:37 AM

I can recall only parts of the original verse from memory. One aspect of ezb I'll never miss is their for-shit search technique. This one is much better.

anyway, I have parts of it:

Leo Mazzone and Lido Mazzilli
One of 'em's _______; the other one's silly
Lido Mazzilli and Leo Mazzone
One is ___________; the other a phony
___________________ Mets
Chased by the men with the buttery nets ....


(and it went on)...

Edgy DC
Oct 20 2005 11:57 AM

i don't know. The ez search engine got nothing. This one gets everything.

Meanwhile, Paydirt.

Johnny Dickshot
Oct 20 2005 12:05 PM

Posterity post: Demeter vs Phoebus, 6/26/02:

I hate 'em each worse than the other

Lido Mazzili and Leo Mazzone,
One of ‘em’s goofy, the other one’s phony.
One of em’s rocking and twisting and twitching,
Passing gas and advice on Atlanta Braves pitching;
The other one’s passing out samples of Midol
To Jeter, that faded matinee idol.
Leo Mazzone and Lido Mazzili,
One of em’s creepy, the other one’s silly.
Melodramatic as old Peter Lorre,
Lido’s a poor imitation of Torre
While Leo looks like a man with Tourette’s
Being chased by the guys with the butterfly nets.
Lido in pinstripes, all glaring and stony,
Is almost as funny as Leo Mazzone.
Both of these cretinous, sinister coaches,
Whose lives I would value below that of roaches,
Are in the tradition of Rockker and Billy,
Goddamned Mazzone and turncoat Mazzili.

sharpie
Oct 20 2005 12:13 PM

A classic. Truly.

Edgy DC
Oct 20 2005 12:28 PM

I kind of liked Dickshot's Lennon-esque psychedelia with "buttery nets."

TheOldMole
Oct 20 2005 01:55 PM

MS -- love it.


And I love the Demeter/Phoebus one, too.

metirish
Oct 20 2005 11:06 PM

And it's official, Mazzone to the O's.

Edgy DC
Oct 20 2005 11:50 PM

Wow!

Good news in Metville. Gotta be.

metirish
Oct 20 2005 11:54 PM

Yeah I think it's great, has a pitching coach changing teams ever had this much juice?, I suppose only Mazzone could trigger this much debate, says a lot about him I think.

TheOldMole
Oct 21 2005 05:54 AM

Johnny Sain would be another.

Edgy DC
Oct 21 2005 08:13 AM

Roger Craig.

TheOldMole
Oct 21 2005 09:53 AM

Second stanza -- incorporating MF:

Omar said to Duquette, "This is all that you get,
Leadin' you around by the nose" --
Jim said, "Minaya, I'll be aiming higher,
Gonna get a job with the O's

In the dugout Metsies still got WIllie
His big ambition is to manage like Blly

Giambi, Like McGwire needed artificial fire
The big "S" you know where that's at
And nothing's getting fat except George's ass

Spacemans Bong
Oct 22 2005 02:33 AM

Johnny Podres was a pretty good pitching coach. Basically invented the circle changeup which was the pitch of the 1990s, and two of its greatest exponents are on the Mets. Pedro learned it from Podres himself.

Sal Maglie wasn't bad, either.

MFS62
Oct 22 2005 09:48 AM

Keep going:

Giambi was busted, disgusted
To the press he seemed flustered
We knew he'd come clean eventu-ly.
He's gettin' paid, no need to pass the hat.
We wondered why his face was gettin' so fat.


But like Mark McGwire, he needed artificial fire
The big "S" you know where that's at
And Jason's face was as fat as George's ass

Your serve. (I may have strayed from the original a bit.)
Later

Frayed Knot
Oct 22 2005 10:01 AM

The Mazzone departure not a total loss for the Braves as it turns out:

From BA:

Because Mazzone's contract with the Braves didn't expire until Nov. 15, the Orioles did send them some compensation. And Atlanta fans who believe in bloodlines should be excited.

The Braves received righthander Moises Hernandez, whose younger brother Felix is only the most exciting young pitcher to come along in years. Moises isn't nearly as highly regarded as Felix but he does have some talent.

Hernandez, 21, signed out of Venezuela in December 2001 and spent all of this season at short-season Aberdeen [NY Penn League]. In 11 games (seven starts), he went 0-4, 3.08. He had a 56-24 strikeout-walk ratio in 53 innings, and opponents hit .217 with two homers against him.

Hernandez' velocity rose this year, and his fastball now resides in the low 90s and occasionally touches 95 mph. He also has a slider and a changeup. He's not a top prospect, but he's intriguing and worth keeping an eye on.

MFS62
Oct 22 2005 02:33 PM

BTW- Mole
Written during the drug hearings earlier this year.
Remember?
*********

Even the Mamas and the Papas knew the steroid hearings were a farce.


Raff and Shillie were actin’ kinda silly
Just wanted to leave the hearings behind
Bud and Donnie workin' for the money
Tryin' to stay to their party line
In a Gov’ment House they sat
And after every speaker, I’d barf into my hat

Jose and McGwire hat size gettin' higher
In Oakland, you know where that's at
And everyone was getting’ fat juiced down to their ass.

Bud said "Sammy, you know there aren't many"
"Who can pretend they don’t understand like you do, what a mouth"
Don said "good golly, Miss Molly I wish"
"I could toss the bull crap you"
Raff, Jose and McGwire sat
(speaking words foul)
And after every speaker I’d barf into my hat

Jose and McGwire hat size gettin' higher
In Oakland, you know where that's at
And everyone was getting’ fat juiced down to their ass.


When Jose was a sophomore, the Bruise Brothers tried to go for
An edge to accelerate their play – ay-oh
Took some stuff through a spike, turned them both Apollo-like
Making other teams’ pitchers pray
When Jose went home he lacked the love bumps
He tried to chalk it up to a case of kid’s mumps.

Jose and McGwire hat size gettin' higher
In Oakland, you know where that's at
And everyone was getting’ fat juiced down to their ass.

Acne bumps, muscle pumps, no slumps, no pants bumps
They don’t work as hard as they play
Salve up, shoot up, and the BALCO makeup
Take it while they work out every day - ayyyy
At least the coke was taken by the spoonful
But the shots and the creams were even more than useful

Jose and McGwire hat size gettin' higher
In Oakland, you know where that's at
And everyone was getting’ fat juiced down to their ass.
Di-di-di-dit dit dit di-di-di-dit, who-o-oa

**Flute**

The guys that were busted, now they can't be trusted
And they’re there to just cop a plea.
Curt couldn’t take it, but now he’ll even take it
We hoped he’d come around eventually.
The stats are lyin' on their baseball cards
That’s low rent, and believing them will be hard

We had some good vibrations and our imaginations
Can't go on indefinitely
But a strong drug testing program ain’t becoming a reality.

**********************************************************************

TheOldMole
Oct 22 2005 05:05 PM

MF -- that's great.