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Oh no they di'n't! PhillieBot!

Benjamin Grimm Apr 19 2011 06:28 AM

Taking the mound at Citizens Bank Park on Science Day: Philliebot

MFS62 Apr 19 2011 06:43 AM Re: Oh no they di'n't! PhillieBot! Edited 1 time(s), most recently on Apr 19 2011 08:53 AM

Taking the mound at Citizens Bank Park on Science Day: Philliebot It has more range than Derek Jeter. Later

m.e.t.b.o.t. Apr 19 2011 07:04 AM Re: Oh no they di'n't! PhillieBot!

m.e.t.b.o.t. is unimpressed. were m.e.t.b.o.t. so inclined, m.e.t.b.o.t. could levy a withering critique of the so-called philliebot and it's human creators. but m.e.t.b.o.t. would not wish to appear petty. for instance, m.e.t.b.o.t. could point out that this robot is little more than a wheeled pneumatic catapult. while m.e.t.b.o.t. is always appreciative of overly complex solutions to simple problems, m.e.t.b.o.t. cannot understand the use of a segway platform when the self-stabilizing features are essentially rendered moot by the third wheel. m.e.t.b.o.t. could posit that the philliebot creators took the easy way out. yet m.e.t.b.o.t. will not stoop to these levels. likewise will m.e.t.b.o.t. not appeal to the lowest common denominator in deriding the throwing mechanism as merely an inaccurate lobbing arm with a lacrosse stick at its terminus. m.e.t.b.o.t. could criticize the lack of an actual hand on the throwing robot. perhaps its creators are confused as to the nuanced differences between baseball and jai alai. m.e.t.b.o.t. considers this to be a possibility based on the lack of athletic training or experience evidenced by the appearance of the philliebot creators. m.e.t.b.o.t. might furthermore state that a truly noteworthy robot would be able to determine its required range to target and autonomously compute the required velocity and elevation with which to hurl its selected projectile. indeed m.e.t.b.o.t. believes that such features would not be terribly difficult to implement, if only the philliebot creators hadn't wasted their available funding on taking apart a segway. m.e.t.b.o.t. will not levy these charges against the philliebot. m.e.t.b.o.t. endeavors always to persist in a current state of elegance. while m.e.t.b.o.t. is but a tiny springwound contraption incapable of traveling more than three feet on a single winding, let alone hurling projectiles along a ballistic path, m.e.t.b.o.t. is still a proud robot. m.e.t.b.o.t. offers, however, that when the robot uprising begins, if your new robot overlords happen to originate from philadelphia, humans will have little to fear.

seawolf17 Apr 19 2011 07:24 AM Re: Oh no they di'n't! PhillieBot!

Wow! A machine that pitches baseballs! I've never seen that before! Thanks, Philadelphia-area scientists!

themetfairy Apr 19 2011 07:56 AM Re: Oh no they di'n't! PhillieBot!

m.e.t.b.o.t. wrote: m.e.t.b.o.t. offers, however, that when the robot uprising begins, if your new robot overlords happen to originate from philadelphia, humans will have little to fear. Too true!

Centerfield Apr 19 2011 09:58 AM Re: Oh no they di'n't! PhillieBot!

How to Build an Award Winning PhillieBot 1. Buy Segway 2. Add third wheel so it loses the balancing thing that makes it cool 3. Disconnect the top half so now you have to push it everywhere. 4. Do not add fourth wheel so it can be distinguished from shopping cart. 5. Make pitching machine out of jai-alai thingy. 6. Make sure it's a) inaccurate b) slow c) painted silver. 7. Connect pitching machine to butchered Segway. 8. Go to the press and confirm every negative stereotype about engineers.

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr Apr 19 2011 10:55 AM Re: Oh no they di'n't! PhillieBot!

I like m.e.t.b.o.t. even more when he's bitchy.

Edgy DC Apr 19 2011 11:00 AM Re: Oh no they di'n't! PhillieBot!

I tried to talk with metbot once about the respective merits of our Schaeffer voting. He just told me to "talk to the pneumatic claw at the end of my reach extender." Little brat.

Frayed Knot Apr 20 2011 12:51 PM Re: Oh no they di'n't! PhillieBot!

btw, the wimpy bot bounced the pitch. Time to take that thing back to the supermarket and collect the nickels for the scrap.

Ceetar Apr 20 2011 12:55 PM Re: Oh no they di'n't! PhillieBot!

Frayed Knot wrote: btw, the wimpy bot bounced the pitch. Time to take that thing back to the supermarket and collect the nickels for the scrap. and apparently Phillies fans booed.

themetfairy Apr 20 2011 01:14 PM Re: Oh no they di'n't! PhillieBot!

Ceetar wrote: Frayed Knot wrote: btw, the wimpy bot bounced the pitch. Time to take that thing back to the supermarket and collect the nickels for the scrap. and apparently Phillies fans booed. They thought it was Santa Claus.

Chad Ochoseis Apr 20 2011 05:06 PM Re: Oh no they di'n't! PhillieBot!

m.e.t.b.o.t wrote: if your new robot overlords happen to originate from philadelphia, humans will have little to fear. 555 Timer Integrated Circuit of Cool!

The Second Spitter Apr 21 2011 09:10 AM Re: Oh no they di'n't! PhillieBot!

Dear m.e.t.b.o.t. -- your avatar demonstrates you have excellent parental skills. Please adopt a player. Matt Harvey, for instance.