Aug 04 2011 08:57 AM
You're casting for a movie, and the NFL is under a work stoppage and every player from every era is being made available for acting duty.
Now, you want somebody experienced. But we're trying to skew a little bit away from guys who only appeared once or twice as themselves or as slim variations of themselves in football-themed movies. No Ed O'Neills or Lee Majors guys who played college ball or barely got out of NFL camp or played three games with the USFL. Nor do we want sucky players who became wrestlers and then actors.
And we're not looking for quarterback-types here. Your script says "goon." And it's a goon we want. Who do you call? (I'll give you three picks to call in to your audition, then we'll have goon-off vote.)
1) Lyle Alzado, as seen in The Destroyer, et al.
2) Brian Bosworth, as seen in Stone Cold, et al.
3) Jim Brown, as seen in Slaughter, et al.
4) Dick Butkus, as seen (here with Bubba Smith) in , et al.
5) Fred Dryer, as seen in Hunter, et al.
6) Rosie Grier, as seen in The Thing with Two Heads, et al.
7) Alex Karras as seen in Blazing Saddles, et al.
8) Howie Long, as seen in Firestorm, et al.
9) Joe Klecko, as seen in Cannonball Run, et al.
10) John Matuszak as seen (sorta) in The Goonies, et al.
11) Merlin Olsen, as seen in Little House on the Prairie, et al.
12) Bill Romanowski, as seen in Get Smart, et al.
13) OJ Simpson, as seen in Airplane!, et al.
14) Bubba Smith, as seen in Police Academy, et al.
15) Lawrence Taylor, as seen Any Given Sunday, et al.