Forum Home

Master Index of Archived Threads


KTE: Miami Marlins, May 11-13

Gwreck
May 10 2012 09:50 PM

This weekend is the Mets' first ever visit to the Marlins Park, home of the [crossout]Florida[/crossout] Miami Marlins. Here's what you need to know about the park:

1. It's got a big field...
344' down the left field line; 422' to center; 335' to right; and the alleys are 386' and 392. It's early, but it looks to already be unfriendly to home runs.

For perspective, check this out compared to Petco (the blue line is the Marlins' Park).

2. ...but not that many seats...
37,000 seats is the smallest seating capacity in the Majors.

3. ...which haven't been filled.
They pulled in 36,601 for opening day. They're averaging 30,681 per game to date.

4. It's got a retractable roof, which has been closed a bunch.
They've had it open for only 4 (of 11) games this year. Weather forecasts suggest that Friday night could be an open-air night. Sunday afternoon looks like it'll be closed.

5. There is a
pool. There are fishtanks behind home plate.
For most ballparks, that's a sufficient number of pieces of flair. Not here though, apparently, because there's also:

6. THIS:



Here it is in action:
[youtube]esWB4wUoPwQ[/youtube]

Let's run this sucker down, play-by-play:
1. The Marlin on the top goes up and down and spins around once;
2. Two (2) Marlins jump out of the water and go around in circles;
3. The water cannon goes off when the fish return to the water;
3. Two (2) birds fly around around the palm trees;
4. Two (2) flamingos flap their wings;
5. The water "waves" back and forth;
6. The sun lights up and "explodes;"
7. The flowers light up and flash; and
8. Chasing lights all over.

There is no single word that can be used to describe this device, nor is there any single word description ("incredible," "ghastly," "fearsome") that would be incorrect.

The Miami Herald recently held a contest to name it and the winning submission was "Marlinator." I actually think that's a great choice.

KTE Trivia:
The Mets are 4-6 in their last ten games when playing a regular-season game at a stadium for the first time. What were those 10 stadia? (And which four did they win?)

Marlin Updates:
We saw the Marlins in New York a couple of weeks ago (previous KTE here) and swept them, in part due to superior enemy knowledge and in part due to their atrociously bad bullpen. (Parts not necessarily proportional).

Since that time, they've improved markedly, winning 8 of their last 10, with all their wins coming on the road. They had Thursday off as well but did go 12 innings in Houston on Wednesday night. Gincarlo Stanton started hitting homers, but still has only hit one at home (5 on the road). Omar Infante remains hot. Reyes is still not producing at the level at which we know he is capable (.233/.321/.325 so far). Starting pitching is a strength. Still, no reason why we shouldn't be able to sweep these guys again, with our best pitchers going, particularly if we keep games close before getting to their bullpen.

Pitching Matchups:
Friday:
Mark Buehrle (L) v. Johan Santana
Buehrle has two no-hitters. The Mets, as you may have heard, will be playing their 8,000th game on Friday and have none.
This is Buehrle's second-ever time facing the Mets. A couple of weeks ago he pitched very well against the Mets but Dickey was slightly better.

Saturday (1:05 PM EDT Start):
Ricky Nolasco (R) v. R.A. Dickey
A couple of weeks ago, Nolasco also pitched very well against the Mets, and in fact was slightly better than Jon Niese. Thanks in large part to Heath Bell, the Mets won anyway.

Sunday (1:10 PM EDT Start):
Carlos Zambrano (R) v. Jon Niese
Zambrano fell out of favor in Chicago after stunts like this and was traded in the offseason with the Cubs picking up $15.45 million of the tab for his 2012 salary. Zambrano turns 31 in June and is a free agent at the end of the year, so I suppose it figures he's gotten his act back together and is pitching like a star again (1-2 in 6 starts, 1.98 ERA and 1.02 WHIP, 32 Ks and 14 walks).

Zambrano has faced the Mets plenty over the years, usually winning. His last game against the Mets was in May 2011, winning the rubber game at Wrigley (pitching well) when it was raining and RA Dickey left early with a twisted ankle before the Cubs pounded the Mets' bullpen. The Mets last beat Zambrano in a April 2010 game where Pelfrey outpiched him.

Zambrano is also dangerous at the plate and must be taken seriously as a hitter (.848 OPS last year).

Marlin Bullpen:
Heath Bell lost his closer's job, in large part due to blown saves like the one in this glorious game. Anyone feeling bad for Heath? Nope?

His replacement, Steve Cishek, blew the save in his first chance in Houston on Wednesday night (the Marlins would win in 12 innings).

Marlins Music:
In preparing for this KTE, I found the most amazing tune about this weekend's opponent. And no, it's not the execrable thing Scott Stapp put out a couple years ago ("Marlins Will Soar"), although it might be almost as bad. Sadly, the Marlins have claimed that this is not an official song of the team but don't let that stop your enjoyment of:

"We Are the Marlins"

First, the truly amazing lyrics:

M-A-R-L-I-N-S! We are the Marlins! GO FISH!
Everything is great in the Sunshine State
We've got the Marlins, the Miami Marlins
So get up and let's go -- let everybody know that we are the Marlins - The Miami Marlins!
Catch the wave! Cheer the boys (We are the Marlins! GO Fish!)
Stomp your feet and let's make some noise!
We are the Marlins, the Miami Marlins
Make a date with the Marlins -- those Miami Darlins
Let's go Marlins!
Black Yellow Orange and Blue - We are coming after you!
Catch the wave! Cheer the boys (We are the Marlins! GO Fish!)
Stomp your feet and let's make some noise!
We are the Marlins, the Miami Marlins
Make a date with the Marlins -- those Miami Darlins
Let's go Marlins!
M-A-R-L-I-N-S! We are the Marlins! GO FISH!

And to put it all together, let's have this tune synced to video of the Marlinator:
[youtube]k0H9VthNLh8[/youtube]

Ceetar
May 10 2012 10:01 PM
Re: KTE: Miami Marlins, May 11-13

The Mets are 4-6 in their last ten games when playing a regular-season game at a stadium for the first time. What were those 10 stadia? (And which four did they win?)


Hmm.

Nats Park (won?)
Yankee Stadium III (lost?)
Citi Field: lost
RFK: (Won?)
Busch Stadium (III?): Won.(swept actually. This was the 2006 ring ceremony)

I'm murky on the others. Could be PNC and AT&T. I suspect Turner Field and Minute Maid are not in the last 10. There are probably a couple of interleague parks in there since then. Angel Stadium? (was the 2008 Willie firing the first time there?) Ballpark at Arlington?

batmagadanleadoff
May 10 2012 10:21 PM
Re: KTE: Miami Marlins, May 11-13

Gwreck wrote:
This weekend is the Mets' first ever visit to the Marlins Park, home of the [crossout]Florida[/crossout] Miami Marlins. Here's what you need to know about the park:



What's their Jackie Robinson Rotunda like?

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr
May 10 2012 11:39 PM
Re: KTE: Miami Marlins, May 11-13

Edited 1 time(s), most recently on May 11 2012 06:28 AM

Thank you-- I'm not sure that's the right thing to say, exactly, but still-- for rooting out "We Are The Marlins," GWreck.

This weekend is the Mets' first ever visit to the Marlins Park, home of the [crossout]Florida[/crossout] Miami Marlins. Here's what you need to know about the park:



What's their Jackie Robinson Rotunda like?


Topless. Apparently.



The club in CF-- you'll probably hear the music thumping in the background in-game, as if from an inconsiderate upstairs neighbor-- is called the Clevelander; admission to the club/game/poolside gawking/the privilege of paying an extra few bucks for Coronitas-and-sweet-potato-fries runs $75.

The Second Spitter
May 11 2012 02:17 AM
Re: KTE: Miami Marlins, May 11-13

Started reading this KTE without looking at the author. I figured the author was LWFS, which I guess is the gold standard of KTEs.






Let's run this sucker down, play-by-play:
1. The Marlin on the top goes up and down and spins around once;
2. Two (2) Marlins jump out of the water and go around in circles;
3. The water cannon goes off when the fish return to the water;
3. Two (2) birds fly around around the palm trees;
4. Two (2) flamingos flap their wings;
5. The water "waves" back and forth;
6. The sun lights up and "explodes;"
7. The flowers light up and flash; and
8. Chasing lights all over.


Brilliant.

metsguyinmichigan
May 11 2012 04:32 AM
Re: KTE: Miami Marlins, May 11-13

Outstanding KTE!!!

And, of those two painted ladies, the yellowish one -- I don't think they're real.

bmfc1
May 11 2012 05:49 AM
Re: KTE: Miami Marlins, May 11-13

The rundown of the "Marlinator" action and the unearthing of that official song was brilliant.

themetfairy
May 11 2012 06:31 AM
Re: KTE: Miami Marlins, May 11-13

Well done Gwreck!

Go Fish? Really? ROFL!

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr
May 11 2012 06:31 AM
Re: KTE: Miami Marlins, May 11-13

I would also like to note that my 2-year-old daughter loves fish and has an age-appropriate affinity for bright kitsch, and SHE's more than a little freaked out/confused by the Marlinator.

Go Fish, GWreck.

smg58
May 11 2012 06:40 AM
Re: KTE: Miami Marlins, May 11-13

Looks like they had plenty of space to add more seats.

G-Fafif
May 11 2012 06:43 AM
Re: KTE: Miami Marlins, May 11-13

Superb as always, 'wreck.

Reyes coming around a bit, per Rubin:

In his past 10 starts, Reyes has a .400 on-base percentage and four steals in five attempts. For the season, the ex-Met still is hitting a paltry .233 with a .321 OBP and eight steals.

MFS62
May 11 2012 08:14 AM
Re: KTE: Miami Marlins, May 11-13

metsguyinmichigan wrote:
Outstanding KTE!!!

And, of those two painted ladies, the yellowish one -- I don't think they're real.

They were, last time I checked.
Yes, outstanding KTE!

Later

Edgy MD
May 11 2012 08:20 AM
Re: KTE: Miami Marlins, May 11-13

Guys, I work for a religious organization. In an open cube. Be cool about nsfw images, man.

Ceetar
May 11 2012 08:39 AM
Re: KTE: Miami Marlins, May 11-13

Edgy DC wrote:
Guys, I work for a religious organization. In an open cube. Be cool about nsfw images, man.


I'm always disappointed when I go to the Red Light Forum.

soupcan
May 11 2012 09:21 AM
Re: KTE: Miami Marlins, May 11-13

Edgy DC wrote:
Guys, I work for a religious organization. In an open cube. Be cool about nsfw images, man.



I think they are actually in sheer body stockings that are then airbrushed. I can't imagine MLB would allow that.

However....


OE: On second look - nope, I'm incorrect but their nipples are covered with some patch or something.

Excellent KTE btw.

Fman99
May 11 2012 12:00 PM
Re: KTE: Miami Marlins, May 11-13

I feel bad for Edgy, when he wanks at work he has to use images of fully clothed men.

Those girls are totally real.