Aug 18 2012 02:50 PM
Re: IGT 8/18/12 -- Mets @ Washington
Well, I wanna tell ya we got this kid leading off who's playing short and he's kinda short but he goes inta the hole like nobody's business and he's all business and he's Ruben Tejada - SS
Our second batter's a fella who's been back some time and he went back t'the wall and he made a splendid catch and saved the franchise's first no-hitter and ya need t'have one'a those unless ya wanna give up hits all yer life and he's Mike Baxter - RF
We got a fella who's in the third hole and that's the base he plays and the corner could get mighty hot when I was in the employ of the organization and we tried all kindsa fellas but this one's a clean liver and ya might even say he's got a clean liver and when he gets a few more hits he's gonna have more hits than anybody the organization ever had from any corner and he's David Wright - 3B
My cleanup hitter's been known to clean up a few messes on the bases though sometimes he does his best cleaning when nobody's on like that night in the desert when it was hot but it was a dry heat and this fella dried off the bases three times though nobody was on and he scored three times all around the bases though we lost ya couldn't blame him and he's Ike Davis - 1B
This next fella's Irish and I played with some of their finest people and go back to Cornelius McGillicuddy before he was either a stadium or an institution which is a good thing to be if ya want job security and McGillicuddy had it because he owned a piece of the Ath-a-letics until he owned the whole pie and when ya got the pie they can't tell ya yer services are no longer required as I was told my previous employer in this here city despite my having some sort of success with them but this feller's had some success too and he plays deep but he makes the plays and there isn't a finer Irish lad you'd rather have with a man on base who you want'a be driven home and he's Daniel Murphy - 2B
Well, this next feller we're playing him in left though we could put him in center or sometimes in right and we've seen him all over the infield yet we think his future might be in left field but not left out because he never fails to inject himself into the action though sometimes he waits until it gets late and yer not expecting it and when you have a man come off the bench and deliver you a blow yer gonna find yerself in the starting lineup more often than not and you need a man who can give the ball a spin and he's Jordany Valdespin - LF
My center fielder is a fellow who sometimes don't concentrate too good which is easy to do is this business of baseball, the greatest business there ever been in sports and I speak only as a baseball man and not representin' any other sports business at the present time and you can make a good living in baseball and you can put a little something away as annuity for a rainy day and in my time we had plenty of rain and we usually had a rainout because they had yet to invent the tarpaulin and you'd find yourself back on the train and headed out west to St. Louie and there'd be a doubleheader later in September and they'd charge two separate admissions if they could but ya couldn't get away with that the way you can now because people don't concentrate so good for a full nine innings and maybe nine more and you'd clear the place out and I oughta know because I been cleared out from some fine establishments in my day and maybe this will be the day for Andres Torres - CF
Behind the plate I'm playin' my man who played most of the year even though his catching comes up a little short of what ya want it to be and his hitting ain't so long either but he comes out early and he puts on his shinguards and he puts on his special mask and he puts on his special bird cage that keeps him from getting socked in the jaw every time a runner comes at him which is frequently in the late stages of our games because my bullpen is full'a men who can't seem to keep the ball in the infield and there's always a play at the plate and my man stands in there and sometime he gets runned over and sometimes he drops the ball but he's back there the next day with the shinguards and the mask and he protects his chest which is a good thing if you want'a have a career in this here game and he's Josh Thole - C
My number nine batter is one of my number one pitchers though we have at least three number one pitchers and I like to say every man has to pitch like a number one when he has the ball and he has to keep the strikes ahead of the balls and this feller does that most of the time and this one time we use him to pinch-hit when we got nobody else and he comes up with a triple and we lose the game anyway but ya can't blame him because he's a pitcher and sometimes he loses the game that way which is something my coaches and me need to correct because if we don't we don't got much of a future and I'm not sure anyone does at my advanced age but he's young and he has a disposition that's nice and that's his name, Jonathon Niese - LHP