Master Index of Archived Threads
You Must Have Fallen From Heaven
ScarletKnight41 Dec 14 2005 04:06 PM |
[url=http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,11069-1927757,00.html]Because that explains how you messed up your face.[/url]
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Yancy Street Gang Dec 14 2005 04:11 PM |
I guess I didn't pay enough attention in Sex Education, but I didn't think that falling out of an airplane could make you pregnant.
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seawolf17 Dec 14 2005 04:13 PM |
It's not falling out of the plane that does it; it's having sex while falling out of the plane.
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Yancy Street Gang Dec 14 2005 04:36 PM |
Huh! Then it's a wonder that I'm not pregnant.
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metsmarathon Dec 14 2005 05:17 PM |
"Lieutenant Charles Williams, of the Irish Guards, survived falling 3,500ft in Kenya in 1994 when his feet got caught in the cords of his tangled parachute. His fall was broken by the roof of a shack and he escaped with three cracked vertebrae and a dislocated finger"
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Elster88 Dec 14 2005 05:25 PM |
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Holy shit! That is one tough mofo. Fucking John Abraham sits out the playoffs with a mild sprain, and this girl is walking around after hitting the ground at 50 MPH.
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Elster88 Dec 14 2005 05:26 PM |
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This one made me crack up:
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MFS62 Dec 15 2005 07:27 AM |
Its great to know that even if your parachute doesn't work, the ground will stop your fall.
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Edgy DC Dec 15 2005 08:07 AM |
Well, the Hess thing has no place among "People Who Survived Great Parachute Mishaps." (A very young George Bush, who didn't climb fully out of his cockpit before deploying, and ended up cracking into the tail section of his plane, and almost snagging his chute there, is better, but still falls short.) Clearly Hess is there because he's Hess. Legend has it that he was captured by a farmer with a pitchfork, a scene that was parodied in To Be or Not To Be.
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Frayed Knot Dec 15 2005 10:04 AM |
This is a good time for the Seinfeld joke about the general uselessness of wearing a helmet in skydiving. Jerry's view was that if the chute fails the helmet is now essentially wearing you!
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MFS62 Dec 15 2005 10:15 AM |
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When he was a satndup comic, Woody Allen had a routine about always carrying a bullet in his shirt pocket. One day he was passing by a building and someone threw a Bible out of a window that fell on him and hit him in the chest. Said Woody "If I hadn't been carrying the bullet, the Bible would have killed me". Later
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seawolf17 Dec 15 2005 10:19 AM |
Admittedly, when I first saw this subject heading, I thought it was going to be a list of really bad pickup lines.
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ScarletKnight41 Dec 15 2005 10:38 AM |
wolf - that's because I was inspired by this Weird Al song -
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Edgy DC Dec 15 2005 10:41 AM |
"Hey...somebody farted! You and me should get out of here."
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Willets Point Dec 15 2005 10:51 AM |
Librarian pick up lines:
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MFS62 Dec 15 2005 11:02 AM |
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The turn down line most often heard from a woman programmer; "Byte me" Later
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Willets Point Dec 15 2005 11:06 AM |
Is that a turn down or an invitation?
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MFS62 Dec 15 2005 11:22 AM |
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Mmmm. Good point. Let me think about that a while and I'll get back to ya'. LOL! Later
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Frayed Knot Dec 15 2005 11:32 AM |
Woody Allen on oral contraception:
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