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Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

soupcan Jun 03 2013 09:45 AM

Michael Douglas wrote: “…without wanting to get too specific, this particular cancer is caused by HPV, which actually comes about from cunnilingus. I mean, I did worry if the stress caused by my son's incarceration didn't help trigger it. But yeah, it's a sexually transmitted disease that causes cancer. And if you have it, cunnilingus is also the best cure for it." Says Douglas. "It giveth and it taketh." Whaaaat….?!

metirish Jun 03 2013 09:48 AM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

WTF, he got cancer from eating out Catherine Zeta Jones?

Benjamin Grimm Jun 03 2013 09:53 AM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

Well... if you have to get cancer, there are far worse ways to do it. It wasn't necessarily CZJ, though. Michael Douglas "came out" as a sex addict a few years ago; he probably had many many partners from whom he might have caught the virus.

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr Jun 03 2013 09:55 AM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

"Um. Yeah. It was totally Catherine. Sure, that's it. Definitely not from anyone else's vagina, or anus." [Fidgets nervously with Astroglide in pocket]

soupcan Jun 03 2013 10:04 AM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

I'm just confused by his apparently saying that once you have this particular type of cancer, and that if you got it through cunnilingus, then more cunnilingus is the best treatment. What am i missing or misinterpreting?

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr Jun 03 2013 10:11 AM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

People will say a lot of things to get more cunnilingus. (There doesn't appear to be any evidence that "more cunnilingus" is an effective cancer treatment/prophylactic.)

Fman99 Jun 03 2013 10:16 AM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

I'd like to also "come out" at this time. I'm addicted to sex with Catherine Zeta Jones' vagina and/or anus using my face as a sexual implement.

soupcan Jun 03 2013 10:25 AM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr wrote: (There doesn't appear to be any evidence that "more cunnilingus" is an effective cancer treatment/prophylactic.) Well, duh.

metirish Jun 03 2013 10:49 AM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

This thread is hilarious(apart from the cancer of course)

Benjamin Grimm Jun 03 2013 11:05 AM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

Fman99 wrote: I'd like to also "come out" at this time. I'm addicted to sex with Catherine Zeta Jones' vagina and/or anus using my face as a sexual implement. You lost me on the face-to-anus part.

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr Jun 03 2013 11:20 AM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

I don't think that's an anus-- she just looks VERY different out of makeup.

Vic Sage Jun 03 2013 11:40 AM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

what's all this fuss i hear about Colonel Angus?

seawolf17 Jun 03 2013 12:04 PM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

Vic Sage wrote: what's all this fuss i hear about Colonel Angus? One of my favorite SNL skits ever. http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/ ... me/n11685/ Is that what Michael Douglas looks like now?! Holy hell.

Edgy MD Jun 03 2013 12:14 PM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

As to the what-causes-the-disease-treats-the-disease angle, you can write it --- and almost all of this story --- off to "I'm trying to promote a movie here."

Mets – Willets Point Jun 03 2013 12:18 PM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

Michael Douglas is Kenesaw Mountain Landis

Benjamin Grimm Jun 03 2013 12:24 PM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

Wait... I thought he was Liberace!?!? Are you saying that Judge Landis and Liberace were the same guy??? (That actually explains a lot!)

Zvon Jun 03 2013 02:48 PM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

I have to wonder why he even made the statement. Just P.R. for the movie? Strange thing to say. It does get peoples attention though.

Edgy MD Jun 03 2013 02:55 PM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

That's what I'm saying.

soupcan Jun 03 2013 02:56 PM Re: Smoking Is The Best Cure For Lung Cancer

Michael Douglas is [crossout]Kenesaw Mountain Landis[/crossout] Kirk Douglas