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Bad pun riddles

Bret Sabermetric Dec 18 2005 07:04 PM

Which former Minnesota 3bman was half-man, half-Abominable Snow Man?

DocTee Dec 18 2005 07:34 PM

Gary Gaetti (guy-yetti)

Zvon Dec 18 2005 08:05 PM

lol,... thats a good one! You got more? *Z tries to think of one. What former Met always carried his bags with him?

smg58 Dec 18 2005 11:03 PM

Mark Carreon.

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 05:24 AM

Which former Mets pitcher was a particularly blunt yet honest string instrument?

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 05:33 AM

Which former Mets' catcher supplied fuel for locomotives?

ScarletKnight41 Dec 19 2005 05:40 AM

Bret Sabermetric wrote: Which former Mets pitcher was a particularly blunt yet honest string instrument? Frank Viola

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 05:41 AM

Which Mets prospect (and later Cardinals coach) was a wealthy above-par golfer?

ScarletKnight41 Dec 19 2005 05:41 AM

Bret Sabermetric wrote: Which former Mets' catcher supplied fuel for locomotives? Choo Choo Coleman, Bub!

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 06:04 AM

Which Met 3bman attacked a Las Vegas illusionist?

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 06:13 AM

Which Mets reliever never had quite enough money to pay the check?

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 06:26 AM

I can't find a way to make a riddle pun out of this oddity, but did you ever notice that the one player who has admitted using LSD during a game (with excellent results) is actually named "Ellis, D."?

TheOldMole Dec 19 2005 06:49 AM

What ex-Met catcher would always come up short at Yahtzee?

TheOldMole Dec 19 2005 06:50 AM

A 3Baseman? Then you can't be thinking of Barry Lyon.

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 07:13 AM

Wish I knew Yahtzee rules. No, it wasn't a Lyon. The incident made all the papers and TV news for a week or two there, though.

Edgy DC Dec 19 2005 07:16 AM

That would be Brook Four Dice.

MFS62 Dec 19 2005 07:20 AM

sigh I can't wait for pitchers and catchers. We've got cabin fever. Later

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 07:30 AM

Which Mets infielder was the tactiturn head of a monastery?

seawolf17 Dec 19 2005 07:31 AM

Bret Sabermetric wrote: Which Mets infielder was the tactiturn head of a monastery? That would be "Curt Abbot".

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 07:37 AM

And which Mets catcher was a Catholic churchman whose voice required amplication?

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 07:51 AM

Which current Mets pitcher is a particularly well-pressed junior officer in the U.S. Navy?

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 09:49 AM

Do yuz want more time to work on these, more bad pun riddles, or just the answers?

Willets Point Dec 19 2005 09:53 AM

Bret Sabermetric wrote: Which current Mets pitcher is a particularly well-pressed junior officer in the U.S. Navy? Crisp Ensign.

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 10:12 AM

There, that wasn't so hard, was it? The Las Vegas illusionist one is rather clever, if I say so myself. Although the problem may be my wording. I'm not sure if the guy who got mauled in Las Veagas last year is actually an illusionist. Let's say he was part of a famous duo training dangerous jungle cats.

Willets Point Dec 19 2005 10:25 AM

Bret Sabermetric wrote: Which Met 3bman attacked a Las Vegas illusionist? Roy Staiger.

Valadius Dec 19 2005 10:25 AM

Bret Sabermetric wrote: Which Met 3bman attacked a Las Vegas illusionist? Roy Staiger (Roy's Tiger).

Willets Point Dec 19 2005 10:29 AM

Bret Sabermetric wrote: And which Mets catcher was a Catholic churchman whose voice required amplication? Mike Bishop.

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 10:30 AM

And it's Willets, by a nose. I guess that "illusionist" stuff threw yuz off. Sorry.

Valadius Dec 19 2005 10:31 AM

More riddles - I think we have all but two.

Willets Point Dec 19 2005 10:32 AM

Actually I figured it out before I saw your clue. "Las Vegas Illusionist" in Google pull's up Roy Horn and the tiger several times. I had to go to UMDB to find a Met named Roy.

Willets Point Dec 19 2005 10:34 AM

What mid-60's Met pitcher stole from Capability Brown?

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 10:46 AM

That would be Rob Gardner. Which early Met was a chef whose kitchen was located on a precipice? And as a followup to Rob Gardner, which Met infielder went into farm buildings for the purposes of stripping them bare?

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 10:57 AM

Which Met (and Yankee) substitute's name stands for all substitute players?

Willets Point Dec 19 2005 10:59 AM

Cliff Cook. Rob McDonald. Still stuck on the rich golfer and the impecunious reliever.

Willets Point Dec 19 2005 11:00 AM

Bret Sabermetric wrote: Which Mets reliever never had quite enough money to pay the check? Bill Short (duh).

Willets Point Dec 19 2005 11:04 AM

Bret Sabermetric wrote: Which Met (and Yankee) substitute's name stands for all substitute players? Phil Linz.

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 11:05 AM

I'm not getting Rob McDonald. The wealthy golfer never played for the Mets (though he was part of the Swoboda-Hahn trade).

Willets Point Dec 19 2005 11:11 AM

Rich Hacker. Uber-obscure. I guess Old Macdonald's Farm is not being burglarized after all so I'm still stumped by that one.

Willets Point Dec 19 2005 11:14 AM

What Met will be the undertaker for General Noriega's funeral? What Met is the latest techno-gadget for brides who want to be heard by the whole congregation at their wedding? What Met acts as a fashion consultant for birds of prey?

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 11:25 AM

Willets Point wrote: Rich Hacker. Uber-obscure. Not to Cardinals fans. He was St. Louis's Matt Galante for years.

Willets Point Dec 19 2005 11:27 AM

I'm no Cardinals fan. And it's obscure because he didn't play for the Mets. One more: What Met outfielder specializes in body-piercing the male genitalia?

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 11:31 AM

Willets Point wrote: What Met is the latest techno-gadget for brides who want to be heard by the whole congregation at their wedding? Mike Veil

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 11:32 AM

Willets Point wrote: One more: What Met outfielder specializes in body-piercing the male genitalia? Lance Johnson Ouch. The undertaker is "Bury Manuel."

Valadius Dec 19 2005 11:48 AM

Willets Point wrote: What Met will be the undertaker for General Noriega's funeral? Barry Manuel.

Valadius Dec 19 2005 11:50 AM

Again? Come on now.

Valadius Dec 19 2005 11:50 AM

Willets Point wrote: What Met acts as a fashion consultant for birds of prey? Hawk Taylor.

MFS62 Dec 19 2005 11:53 AM

What sport should the manager of the Twins be wary of? Later

Johnny Dickshot Dec 19 2005 11:57 AM

Assassination scene?

Willets Point Dec 19 2005 11:58 AM

Croquet?

MFS62 Dec 19 2005 12:23 PM

C'mon guys. Its easy. Later

Willets Point Dec 19 2005 12:31 PM

Baseball? :)

MFS62 Dec 19 2005 12:41 PM

Yes, a Metly baseball name. From the old days. Later

Willets Point Dec 19 2005 12:43 PM

No I was joking that the sport the Twins manager should avoid is baseball. I can't make any good pun from Ron Gardenhire.

MFS62 Dec 19 2005 12:47 PM

="Willets Point"]No I was joking that the sport the Twins manager should avoid is baseball. . I got it. I was playing your straight man. Well, my Red Barber egg timer has lost all its sand. The answer is : Ron Hunt. Thank you for playing. You can pick up you home version of this game on the way out. Later

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 01:14 PM

Okay, that's the end of today's game, with only one player not guessed at.. The final answer is: Loot Barns.

Johnny Dickshot Dec 19 2005 01:53 PM

Nobody's guessed the former Met who is also an assassination scene

Benjamin Grimm Dec 19 2005 01:54 PM

Grassy Knoll?

MFS62 Dec 19 2005 02:05 PM

Dallas Green (as in knoll) Later

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 03:06 PM

Sorry, I thought that was a guess at the game Gardy should avoid.

Willets Point Dec 19 2005 03:27 PM

What Met pitcher was an hirstute valet for a fancy restaurant?

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 03:29 PM

That would be Hairy Parker. What Met pitcher was known for his peculiar style of frisking?

TheOldMole Dec 19 2005 05:04 PM

If he was frisking guys from the 'hood, it could be Pat Mahomes.

Bret Sabermetric Dec 19 2005 06:02 PM

No, but that's excellent, as usual, Mole.

OlerudOwned Dec 19 2005 06:37 PM

The non-'hood frisker would just be Pat Strange. Which Met could've been a manly female sled-dog?

TheOldMole Dec 19 2005 07:03 PM

Butch Huskey. Which Met was more given to making unkind remarks than all the other peers of the realm?

SwitchHitter Dec 19 2005 07:34 PM

I dunno, was Duke Snider ever a Met?

Valadius Dec 19 2005 07:47 PM

He was indeed.

TheOldMole Dec 20 2005 12:08 AM

How about a Met who lifts up large areas of land?

Johnny Dickshot Dec 20 2005 05:00 AM

Jack Aker. What was Seigfried's biggest purchase this year?

Bret Sabermetric Dec 20 2005 07:13 AM

Johnny Dickshot wrote: Jack Aker. What was Seigfried's biggest purchase this year? I dunno. A "How to Spell Your Own Friggen Name" workbook? What happened to providing temporal ("an early Met") or positional clues ("Which current infielder") or something? As in Which former Mets pitcher would be helpful in igniting cigarettes?

Bret Sabermetric Dec 20 2005 07:17 AM

Also this didn't didn't start out ("Gary Gaetti") as all-Mets puns. There's a lot out there, folks, beyond Shea Stadium. As in, Which former Tigers outfielder has a pH greater than 7?

Johnny Dickshot Dec 20 2005 07:37 AM

I'll rephrase. What MET was Seigfried's biggest purchase this year? Which former Mets pitcher would be helpful in igniting cigarettes? A-Lleiter

seawolf17 Dec 20 2005 07:41 AM Edited 1 time(s), most recently on Dec 20 2005 07:43 AM

Bret Sabermetric wrote: Which former Tigers outfielder has a pH greater than 7? That would be Al Kaline. This is a fun game. What former Met reliever was constantly giving haircuts to one of the great film directors?

Frayed Knot Dec 20 2005 07:43 AM

"Which former Tigers outfielder has a pH greater than 7?" Al Kaline

Edgy DC Dec 20 2005 07:51 AM

Buzz Capra, wolf. Whom did Emily Brontë support for the 1995 Rolaids Award? Yeah, that's right. I used an umlaut. What of it?

Bret Sabermetric Dec 20 2005 08:05 AM

Edgy DC wrote: Buzz Capra, wolf. Whom did Emily Brontë support for the 1995 Rolaids Award? Yeah, that's right. I used an umlaut. What of it? Presumably that would be Heathcliff Sloclum, though I'm not sure where the "Slocum" part fits in to the answer.

Johnny Dickshot Dec 20 2005 08:11 AM

Still on the board: What Met was Seigfried's biggest purchase this year? Who was the young Met who missed the bus?

seawolf17 Dec 20 2005 08:13 AM

Johnny Dickshot wrote: Who was the young Met who missed the bus? That would be Chico Walker.

OlerudOwned Dec 20 2005 08:16 AM

Johnny Dickshot wrote: Still on the board: What Met was Seigfried's biggest purchase this year? Roy Staiger?

seawolf17 Dec 20 2005 08:17 AM

What former MLer not only pitched for both New York and both Chicago teams, but is also currently in rehab, going cold turkey from salmon eggs?

Edgy DC Dec 20 2005 08:20 AM Edited 2 time(s), most recently on Dec 20 2005 08:35 AM

]Presumably that would be Heathcliff Slocum, though I'm not sure where the "Slocum" part fits in to the answer. It doesn't. (It's "Slocumb," with a virtually silent B, acTually.) Emily didn't need too much to swing her vote. And wouldn't it be disgusting if I did work that in somehow?

Johnny Dickshot Dec 20 2005 08:21 AM

]What Met was Seigfried's biggest purchase this year? Roy Staiger? Not Roy's Tiger but...

Edgy DC Dec 20 2005 08:22 AM

Roy's ring. And that must be a hell of a ring to be worth more than a white tiger.

Bret Sabermetric Dec 20 2005 08:25 AM

="Edgy DC"] ]And wouldn't it be disgusting if I did work that in somehow? I couldn't have resisted it for a minute. Uh, for at least seven minutes. That's a minimum. I could have lasted eight, maybe ten minutes, probably, before finally caving to that urge. Sometimes I can go all night. TheOldMole Dec 20 2005 08:31 AM What former Brooklyn Dodger became a pro-choice evangelist? Frayed Knot Dec 20 2005 10:35 AM TheOldMole wrote: What former Brooklyn Dodger became a pro-choice evangelist? Preacher Roe ]What former MLer not only pitched for both New York and both Chicago teams, but is also currently in rehab, going cold turkey from salmon eggs? Dick Tidrow TheOldMole Dec 20 2005 11:28 AM What Cleveland outfielder won't get soggy in milk? Bret Sabermetric Dec 20 2005 11:32 AM Ah, the delicious Coco Crisp. I saw him at Fenway last June, and had a big bowl afterwards. Both great. Edgy DC Dec 20 2005 11:32 AM What Chicago outfielder do you typically prefer to any of your other fabric colorings? seawolf17 Dec 20 2005 11:43 AM That would be Jermaine Dye. TheOldMole Dec 20 2005 11:55 AM What ex-Met and Yankee carries in Eastern mystics? Edgy DC Dec 20 2005 12:02 PM Yogi bearer. Edgy DC Dec 20 2005 12:05 PM What Mets reliever has drunk just about everywhere? Edgy DC Dec 20 2005 01:26 PM Which Met reliever bores at least one sophomore to tears? Which Met reliever comes from a class of black pastors who supposedly talk like they're white? Which Met infielder, when he lived in Scotland, displayed an uncanny ability to distinguish the sound of different sheep? Valadius Dec 20 2005 02:17 PM Edgy DC wrote: Which Met infielder, when he lived in Scotland, displayed an uncanny ability to distinguish the sound of different sheep? Baa be Close? (Bobby Klaus) Edgy DC Dec 20 2005 02:21 PM Not quite, but good thinking. Klaus almost belongs in the Ultimate Reindeer Database. seawolf17 Dec 20 2005 02:27 PM Edgy DC wrote: What Mets reliever has drunk just about everywhere? Would that be Many A-Bar (Manny Aybar)? Edgy DC Dec 20 2005 02:30 PM Many A Bar is indeed our man. Valadius Dec 20 2005 03:05 PM Edgy DC wrote: Which Met infielder, when he lived in Scotland, displayed an uncanny ability to distinguish the sound of different sheep? Ken Baas Well. Edgy DC Dec 20 2005 03:07 PM Aye, Laddy, that he does. Valadius Dec 20 2005 03:11 PM Which Mets starter liked to move bogs around? TheOldMole Dec 20 2005 07:59 PM Pete Walker TheOldMole Dec 21 2005 08:14 PM What former M et will have to give up snakes until he grows up? Edgy DC Dec 22 2005 10:32 AM Um, I don't know. Which Met reliever comes from a class of black pastors who supposedly talk like they're white? TheOldMole Dec 22 2005 04:46 PM Whoo...I can;'t figure that one at all. Edgy DC Dec 22 2005 05:01 PM Somebody step in. Mole and I have a Mexican standoff going. Valadius Dec 22 2005 05:42 PM Junior Noboa. Zvon Dec 22 2005 06:57 PM Valadius wrote: Junior Noboa. that was a good one! OlerudOwned Dec 22 2005 07:17 PM This Met lefty doesnt think you have enough pork. Edgy DC Dec 22 2005 10:10 PM Tim Hamulack. My guy is a sixties guy. Bret Sabermetric Dec 23 2005 04:41 AM Uncle Tom Parsons? Edgy DC Dec 23 2005 06:05 AM Ding. Tom Parsons