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The Semi-Finals; Game 14 (2013-14 CPKC) *Edgy over LWFS*

57's Batting and There's No One On/Eric Valent/Bruce Springsteen: 57 Channels (And Nothin' On)

10 votes

Untitled/Jose Valentin/Daniel Powter: Bad Day

9 votes

batmagadanleadoff Feb 12 2014 10:38 PM Edited 4 time(s), most recently on Feb 26 2014 02:51 PM

[fimg=304:3oo328wf]http://www.nyfuturestars.com/photos/mets022004/images/P3010028.jpg[/fimg:3oo328wf] [fimg=533:3oo328wf]http://www.flushinguniversity.com/moxie/moxiepix/t549.jpg[/fimg:3oo328wf]

batmagadanleadoff Feb 12 2014 10:43 PM Re: The Semi-Finals; Game 14 (2013-14 CPKC)

57's Batting and There's No One On I bought a high-end condo back in the real estate boom I had a granite-counter kitchen and a rumpus room Cable guy came by to hook up the Mets But it was 2004 and they weren't pennant threats I saw Eric Valent swinging and I heard Fran Healy yawn Said “Number 57’s batting and there’s no one on” Well he came over from the Phillies in the Rule V draft Some guys booed him and other guys laughed But he swung a lefty bat and I’m certain that he tried But with Matsui batting leadoff, the bases were unoccupied So when they called on him to pinch-hit and he grabbed his wood baton Fran said that “57’s batting and there’s no one on” [list]Well, Floyd was in left, man, but Floyd was always limpin’! Ice Williams, he was ready to retire and go shrimpin’! And Kaz cried “Sorry Eric! See, I was good in Nippon!” Fran said that “57’s batting and there’s no one on” (break) He had power and average, a good OPS! But the RBI numbers, they just didn't impress! O, Reyes got hurt and then he grew withdrawn Fran said that “57’s batting and there’s no one on”[/list:u] As the season wore down, the roster was pared And Howe's light was dimming, and nobody cared And Jim Duquette, too, heard the sad angel’s horn They even busted Healy and his fuckin’ can of corn But in season’s final contest, Fran gave his fitting dénouement Said “Number 57’s batting… Number 57’s batting… Number 57’s batting and there’s no one on” I kept searchin.. Yeah, I kept searchin… I kept searchin… But every time I looked up from my Szechuan It was "57's batting and there's no one on..." [youtube]5scpDev1qps[/youtube]

batmagadanleadoff Feb 12 2014 10:43 PM Re: The Semi-Finals; Game 14 (2013-14 CPKC)

[youtube:13hdmvok]gH476CxJxfg[/youtube:13hdmvok] Here is the moment that we need you most 
Just one little hit and the Birds will be roast 
Your playoffs have gone, at best, okay But we've just a few more frames to play 
And after Endy's catch.. come on! But you're scratching your 'stache, like you don't even know 
Frozen by one away, you're a statue Zorro Hell, we just need some flyball contact 
Come on Errol Flynn, you've got to act
 And after Endy's catch? COME ON. 'Cause you had a good year, don't louse it up now 
Get a good one inside, then you turn it around
 You step out and get some practice hacks off
 You rub your face-pet, then you wipe the wax off You had a good year, you took some round-trips
 You showed there was life in those calcified hips 
You got it in gear 
At least for one year You DID take some old-man-hurty days 
But you hit two in the clincher, hey
 That's worth some vict'ry reggaeton You had a good year, now just one more punch Will settle suave teeth on Jeff Suppan's lunch 
You look a bit louche, like, half-in-the-bag So buck up you douche, tap that Keith-ishe swag You had a good year, the stat sheet don't lie
 Well, at least, good from May to July
 Still you had a good year
 A somewhat-good year Sometimes a vet'ran flies like a Byrd No matter how Gilkey last year'd been And when it wears off, and he plops like a turd No matter your chagrin You shrug and grin So where was the hit when we needed it most?
 On 1-and-2 
You faded like the world's Most Interesting Ghost Still, you had a good year, though it's near the end
 You did yourself proud, my mustachioed friend
 There's always the ninth, the game will go on 
Maybe a bailout from Floyd or Beltran? You had a good year, however much doom 
It may end in, you deserve a good groom 
It doesn't end here 
There's always next year Had a good year
 Half a good year
 Mostly good year

Zvon Feb 13 2014 12:04 AM Re: The Semi-Finals; Game 14 (2013-14 CPKC)

Both great. So many great lines in both. An extra point from me for the second one because I didn't know the song. Usually that works against an entree with me. Great job both of you.

themetfairy Feb 13 2014 01:01 AM Re: The Semi-Finals; Game 14 (2013-14 CPKC)

I was hoping that someone would do something about Valent's cycle set to Queen's Bicycle Race. I also generally hate the sing-songy Bad Day. But I love how it fits the subject so well here.

d'Kong76 Feb 13 2014 01:38 AM Re: The Semi-Finals; Game 14 (2013-14 CPKC)

themetfairy wrote: I also generally hate the sing-songy Bad Day. I forgot it was an actual song, been so played out in a commercial(s). Voted for it.

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr Feb 13 2014 05:39 AM Re: The Semi-Finals; Game 14 (2013-14 CPKC)

I gotta say, I hate both of these songs-- as artist-recorded-- with a white-hot passion.

batmagadanleadoff Feb 14 2014 08:07 PM Re: The Semi-Finals; Game 14 (2013-14 CPKC)

This one's a real humdinger, and it looks like it's gonna go down to the wire.

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr Feb 26 2014 12:50 AM Re: The Semi-Finals; Game 14 (2013-14 CPKC) *Edgy over LWFS*

It bears repeating: I hatehatehate "Bad Day." But it was close to the emotional bent I was going for with our subject-- "ah, well" appreciation-with-a-little-edge-- was plastic enough to fit multiple-chorus-options well, and, well, it was a 2006 song, and when I'm stuck between a couple of roughly-equal options, I like to go kindasorta period-appropriate (as with "Son of a Preacher Man" for Lolich). Blahblahblah... Floyd limpin' and "shrimpin," "Nippon," "can of corn..." I ran into a friggin' rattlesnake here.

Edgy MD Feb 26 2014 03:16 AM Re: The Semi-Finals; Game 14 (2013-14 CPKC) *Edgy over LWFS*

Well, I guess I think I did a good job shoehorning a tough subject into an uncommon but well-known song. I mean what do I know about Valent? He had one solid year as a reserve outfielder firstbaseman, his wife's name was Jennifer, and he unusually wore 57. Not much there. I agree that the song as recorded is pretty bad. Don't know what possessed Springsteen to make it all bass and no guitar. As Bruce-hungry as the public was at the time, it only became a modest hit after a remixer fixed it for him on an alternative version. But I think it's a real good song as written, and I intentionally chose the alternative live version to get away from the lousy album track. Besides, it gave me four extra lines and an outro to play with. Aside from the shoehorning, though, I wasn't particularly funny... at all... so I was lucky to eke this one out. But yeah, not a matchup of records people wanna hear.