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BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

John Cougar Lunchbucket
Jul 30 2018 03:44 PM

This landed in the 'ol inbox today:

I don't know if you've seen Goergi Vodka they advertise on trucks featuring murals of bikini bottoms, and their product is strictly bottom shelf for heavy drinkers on a budget, and this is a transparent advertising stunt, but still:



FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: July 30, 2018

MEDIA CONTACT:
Barbara Mannellino, (631) 374-7181
Office of Chief Executive Officer Martin Silver
Star Industries, Inc.
Syosset, New York

OWNER OF NY-BASED GEORGI VODKA OFFERS TO BUY THE METS… AGAIN
Owner of New York’s Number One Selling Vodka Hopes To Buy the Struggling Mets
SYOSSET, NEW YORK (July 30, 2018) – Owner of New York’s top-selling Vodka, Georgi Vodka, has announced his intention to buy the New York Mets. Martin Silver is resurrecting his offer, with a group of investors, to buy a percentage of ball club after it was recently announced that the organization would be put up for sale.

Silver, a lifelong Mets fan and season ticket holder, believes that he could help revive the Mets, restore team morale, and give them a jumpstart. Using the successful business model of New York’s top-selling Georgi Vodka, he believes he could show the Mets the way to “Number 1.” The Mets have ranked among the worst teams in the National League and are ranked 25th according to recent Power Rankings, with a current losing-record of 44-59.

Georgi Vodka celebrates 2018 as the 50th Anniversary of Georgi Vodka as a leader in the wine and spirit market. Syosset-based Star Industries, was founded in 1934 by securing one of New York State’s first liquor licenses following prohibition.

###

d'Kong76
Jul 30 2018 04:29 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

I called to ask for comment. A guy answered, "hello?" and I said, "oh, I may
have misdialed I was looking for Barbara." I chickened out and hung up when
he asked who was calling.

Edgy MD
Jul 30 2018 04:36 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

He must get a lot of calls for Barbara.

Lefty Specialist
Jul 30 2018 04:47 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

I'd sell the team to the Russians in a heartbeat. Vladimir Putin wouldn't put up with this shit.

Mets Willets Point
Jul 30 2018 04:57 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

Lefty Specialist wrote:
I'd sell the team to the Russians in a heartbeat. Vladimir Putin wouldn't put up with this shit.


Blow a save and you'll end up with polonium in your water bottle.

Edgy MD
Jul 30 2018 05:34 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

I'd certainly be chuffed if Yakov Smirnoff bought in.

seawolf17
Jul 30 2018 06:18 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

Edgy MD wrote:
I'd certainly be chuffed if Yakov Smirnoff bought in.

You know, the stupid things you remember. I remember thinking his joke -- "In Russia, we have saying: 'women are like buses...' and that's it" -- was HILARIOUS as a kid.

Centerfield
Jul 30 2018 06:22 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

I think this is a great idea.

I look forward to the new ads with "Mets" written across women's butts.

Mets Willets Point
Jul 30 2018 08:01 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

Edgy MD wrote:
I'd certainly be chuffed if Yakov Smirnoff bought in.


And then the Mets would be moved to Branson, MO.

G-Fafif
Jul 30 2018 08:05 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

In America, pitcher who give up runs is sent to showers.
In Russia, pitcher who give up runs is sent to Siberia.

Edgy MD
Jul 30 2018 08:15 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

In America, one day you face Cubs, and then you face the Reds. A few days later, maybe you face Braves or Cubs again!
In Russia, you always face Reds!

cooby
Jul 30 2018 08:16 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

Centerfield wrote:
I think this is a great idea.

I look forward to the new ads with "Mets" written across women's butts.

[/quotejust realized that was sand and not heat rash

G-Fafif
Jul 30 2018 08:17 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

In America, relief pitcher take little car from bullpen to mound.
In Russia, little car take relief pitcher from mound to Siberia.

G-Fafif
Jul 30 2018 08:20 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

In America, you hear 'hot dog!' at ballgame and you decide you want one.
In Russia, you hear cold dog coming after you in Siberia and he decide he want you.

G-Fafif
Jul 30 2018 08:22 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

In America, deGrom pitch very well, get no run support.
In Russia, nobody get anything for anything.

Edgy MD
Jul 30 2018 08:25 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

In America, you get suspended if you take the drugs.

In Russia, is, how you say? REQUIREMENT!

Edgy MD
Jul 30 2018 08:26 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

In Russia, President requires all athletes pay honor to Mother Russia.

In America, President pay honor to Mother Russia!

Edgy MD
Jul 30 2018 08:39 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

In America, best arm belong to Vladimir Guerrero.

In Russia, best arm belong to Vladimir Lenin. Because anybody who threw harder, he went to Siberia!

LeiterWagnerFasterStrongr
Jul 31 2018 03:26 AM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

In America, you find yourself in Party City Deck.

In Russia, party finds you in every city!

Mex17
Jul 31 2018 10:32 AM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

If Baby Boy Jeffy is ever forced by Manfred to sell once Daddy dies, Stuart Sternberg is going to be the guy.

Lefty Specialist
Jul 31 2018 12:04 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

In America, mound visits mean stalling for time.

In Russia, mound visits mean Time for Stalin!

metirish
Jul 31 2018 12:59 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

If nothing else this has made for a great thread comrades.

MFS62
Jul 31 2018 01:57 PM
Re: BUY THE TEAM!!!!!!

Dear Mr. Silver.
While we're waiting for you to buy the team, can you please send me the phone number of that model?
I'll owe you.

Later