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The Shirt That Hurts

Edgy MD Jun 25 2021 08:57 PM

Perhaps the magic of the algoriddums have caught up with you as they've caught up with me. Perhaps a certain Chinese knockoff shop has learned that, hey, you're a dude of a certain age. You like your Mets and you like your Beatles, so somewhere in the social media world they pushed this unauthorized piece of shit at you. [fimg=650]https://assets.viralstyle.com/campaigns/1f0d0fd6-fb92-61f4-5de6-f7d25db31764/eO8GDm-Qk6e2Ew-Dv6pPGO-front-large.jpg[/fimg] OH, where to begin?! 1) The shadows go in four different directions. 2) Way to represent the Mets with four Caucasians. Go hard after that #MAGA demographic, my Chinese friends! 3) Jacob deGrom is wearing football sox, for some reason. 4) Jake's name has a capital D. Wha? 5) Keith is in long, loose-fitting trousers, that are not only uncharacteristic of his time, but still manage to betray a more muscular lower half than he was ever known to have, at least in his Mets days. And then the serious shit. 6) Tom Fuckin' Seaver is a left-fucking-hander? 7) Tom Fuckin' Seaver has a solid white uniform with a solid blue line up the seam? 8) Tom Fuckin' Seaver has a much more ectomorphic body type than he was ever known to sport on a baseball field? Where are those thunderthighs? WHERE'S THE ASS?!! 9) Tom Fuckin' Seaver has ... holy shit! Is that Tom Glavine's signature?! 10) Tom Fuckin' Seaver has ... holy shit! Is that TOM FUCKIN' GLAVINE?!!!

kcmets Jun 25 2021 09:07 PM Re: The Shirt That Hurts

I assumed this was a 7-line shirt before reading your entire post.

Edgy MD Jun 25 2021 09:14 PM Re: The Shirt That Hurts

Actually, that may be something like a Seaver signature. As close to his as Glavine's anyhow.

dinosaur jesus Jun 25 2021 09:21 PM Re: The Shirt That Hurts

11) Keith should be barefoot.

nymr83 Jun 25 2021 09:26 PM Re: The Shirt That Hurts

I was rolling my eyes hard after the first five 'complaints' but you're right, then the serious shit starts. is that Glavine? like, did they really find a picture of Glavine and just say "eh lets use this"

Ceetar Jun 25 2021 09:30 PM Re: The Shirt That Hurts

[url]https://www.reddit.com/r/TargetedShirts/ https://preview.redd.it/m0unpzesq3371.jpg?width=640&crop=smart&auto=webp&s=c29f5257dc1a0dfae9865c6646b031463ea42e90>

Edgy MD Jun 26 2021 07:17 AM Re: The Shirt That Hurts

Yeah, I really should have made this a Highlights magazine contest where you find everything wrong in the picture.

dinosaur jesus Jun 26 2021 12:02 PM Re: The Shirt That Hurts

Not that it's ever going to make much sense, but how would you do a proper Mets Abbey Road shirt? I think it would have to be particular teams, like 1986 with Keith as John, Carter as Paul, Mookie as Ringo, and Gooden as George. Or something like that. And of course Seaver gets to be Paul in 1969 and 1973.

Edgy MD Jun 26 2021 12:23 PM Re: The Shirt That Hurts

It's hard to imagine that there isn't one or two such shirt designs lying digitally dormant on a Zvon hard drive somewhere. You know he'd have a Mets bullpen cart in place of the Volkswagon Beetle.

Fman99 Jun 26 2021 03:34 PM Re: The Shirt That Hurts

Gross.

batmagadanleadoff Jun 26 2021 04:28 PM Re: The Shirt That Hurts

This shirt posted here last year, with Keith holding it up. [FIMG=666]https://live.staticflickr.com/65535/51272033417_fa0688b7cb_b.jpg[/FIMG] It's a photo manipulation. Keith isn't really holding up the shirt, just made to look so. It's a cheap money-grab by an outfit with minimal Mets knowledge who produced the shirt without researching it.

batmagadanleadoff Jun 26 2021 04:34 PM Re: The Shirt That Hurts

This shirt posted here last year, with Keith holding it up. [FIMG=666]https://live.staticflickr.com/65535/51272033417_fa0688b7cb_b.jpg[/FIMG] It's a photo manipulation. Keith isn't really holding up the shirt, just made to look so. It's a cheap money-grab by an outfit with minimal Mets knowledge who produced the shirt without researching it. Here's a variation, with "Mets" in Beatles font. [FIMG=777]https://cdn.gifteeshirt.com/hoang/2021/01/8dfcd171-cool-the-new-york-mets-abbey-road-2021-signatures-shirt_2.jpg[/FIMG]