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You Too Can Be a TV Writer

Edgy MD Jan 06 2022 08:17 AM

Inspired by The Old Mole, this is the thread that asks you to produce the LINE B that seemingly invariably always follows LINE A in TV dialogue, pretty much regardless of genre. For instance you don't have to be watching a detective show (but it helps) to know that "What is it we're looking for?" is generally going to be followed by, "I'll let you know when we find it." So if you hear the line, "What's the deal with you two? Are you, like, a couple or something?" what will the next line almost invariably be?

TransMonk Jan 06 2022 09:00 AM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

"Us? We might be a couple of knuckleheads! But, seriously, we're just friends." "I thought I told you not to come around. What are you doing here?"

stevejrogers Jan 06 2022 10:24 AM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

“It's not what you think it looks like…okay, it is exactly what it looks like!” “Besides, weren't you supposed to be out of town today?”

Fman99 Jan 06 2022 10:35 AM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

"I decided to hang around, see if anything interesting might happen." "What's that supposed to mean?"

Edgy MD Jan 06 2022 11:18 AM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

The correct snippet of dialogue that always follows "What's the deal with you two? Are you, like, a couple or something?" is ... 　　"Who, us? Noooo ... . Why? Did she say something?" ... or a variation thereof.

Willets Point Jan 06 2022 11:22 AM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

Edgy MD wrote: The correct snippet of dialogue that always follows "What's the deal with you two? Are you, like, a couple or something?" is ... 　　"Who, us? Noooo ... . Why? Did she say something?" ... or a variation thereof. I thought the conversation would be conveniently interrupted by another person calling from across the room or over a PA.

Centerfield Jan 06 2022 11:24 AM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

"I decided to hang around, see if anything interesting might happen." "What's that supposed to mean?" What's what supposed to mean? "Well, well, well, what do we have here?"

Benjamin Grimm Jan 06 2022 11:26 AM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

Willets Point wrote: Edgy MD wrote: The correct snippet of dialogue that always follows "What's the deal with you two? Are you, like, a couple or something?" is ... 　　"Who, us? Noooo ... . Why? Did she say something?" ... or a variation thereof. I thought the conversation would be conveniently interrupted by another person calling from across the room or over a PA. That's typically what happens when two people are about to kiss for the first time, but they're slowly bringing their faces closer together. Let that be a lesson kids: When you're going in for a first kiss, don't be tentative! If you are, a car bomb will go off, or there will be an earthquake, or something similar.

Benjamin Grimm Jan 06 2022 11:27 AM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

"Well, well, well, what do we have here?" "It's not what it looks like!" "We just want to ask you a few questions."

Johnny Lunchbucket Jan 06 2022 11:38 AM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

"Never mind the 2 of us. It's you were concerned about."

Fman99 Jan 06 2022 12:53 PM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

See, this is why I could never be a TV writer. And why mainstream television bores me to death. My internal pretend mental responses are always more like this: "I thought I told you not to come around. What are you doing here?" "I'm here to look inside your mom's anus and see if I can find a pinecone I left in there."

Benjamin Grimm Jan 06 2022 01:03 PM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

"I'm here to look inside your mom's anus and see if I can find a pinecone I left in there." I'm pretty sure you stole that line from an episode of Father Knows Best.

Lefty Specialist Jan 06 2022 01:04 PM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

In a million cop shows: a: "Am I in some kind of trouble?" b: "No, we just want to ask you a couple of questions."

Centerfield Jan 06 2022 01:08 PM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

See, this is why I could never be a TV writer. And why mainstream television bores me to death. My internal pretend mental responses are always more like this: "I thought I told you not to come around. What are you doing here?" "I'm here to look inside your mom's anus and see if I can find a pinecone I left in there." A pinecone in the anus you say? Likely story. Step into my office fella...

Edgy MD Jan 06 2022 01:48 PM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

Edgy MD wrote: The correct snippet of dialogue that always follows "What's the deal with you two? Are you, like, a couple or something?" is ... 　　"Who, us? Noooo ... . Why? Did she say something?" ... or a variation thereof. It's a Ross Geller/Chuck Bartowski specialty, guyz.

Frayed Knot Jan 06 2022 02:21 PM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

Benjamin Grimm wrote: "We just want to ask you a few questions." Am I going to need a lawyer?

Edgy MD Jan 06 2022 02:26 PM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

"Sheesh, what's the deal between you and your father?" "_____________________________________________."

Benjamin Grimm Jan 06 2022 02:32 PM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

Frayed Knot wrote: Benjamin Grimm wrote: "We just want to ask you a few questions." Am I going to need a lawyer? "No, we're just going to have a nice friendly chat."

Bob Alpacadaca Jan 06 2022 02:38 PM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

"Us? We might be a couple of knuckleheads! But, seriously, we're just friends." "I thought I told you not to come around. What are you doing here?" "I left my gift basket on the sofa and Derek said I can pick it up."

kcmets Jan 06 2022 03:25 PM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

Benjamin Grimm wrote: I'm pretty sure you stole that line from an episode of Father Knows Best. "Good morning honey. What's the matter?" "Oh Ward, I'm afraid you were a little rough on the beaver last night."

Edgy MD Jan 07 2022 08:39 AM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

Edgy MD wrote: "Sheesh, what's the deal between you and your father?" "_____________________________________________." I thought I left this one on a tee. Think of any show on The CW.

Centerfield Jan 07 2022 08:44 AM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

He wasn't always this way. After my mother died, things...changed."

Edgy MD Jan 07 2022 09:42 AM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

That's not bad. The judges were looking for "He was never there for me. Not in any way that mattered, anyhow." If you watch The CW and drink a shot every time someone says "there for me," you have a good chance of staying pretty lit.

Fman99 Jan 07 2022 09:56 AM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

Ah, CF, you're supposed to supply the next opener though. CPF FAIL

Centerfield Jan 07 2022 10:01 AM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

"My whole life has been a lie."

kcmets Jan 07 2022 12:09 PM Re: You Too Can Be a TV Writer

"My whole life has been a lie." I never really banged all of Croatia.