Sep 10 2006 09:35 PM
Edited 1 time(s), most recently on Sep 10 2006 09:48 PM
New York (CP) - Flushing, Queens Emits Foul Stench
Local authorities were inundated with calls from concerned citizens reporting a foul stench wafting out of Flushing Meadows this afternoon. Initially, authorities mistakenly traced the foul emission to the USTA National Tennis Center where it was believed that the masterful play of Roger Federer had left a scorched Andy Roddick in it's wake. Though Roddick went down in defeat, he looked no worse for wear and put up a valiant effort before succumbing to the incomparable Federer.
Authorities were soon able to determine that the source of the foul odor was slightly to the North of them. Following the wretched odor northward they soon found themselves at Shea Stadium where the Mets were getting their asses handed to them by a rookie left hander making his first ever major league start. Officials arrived in time to see the Mets helplessly flailing at the piches of young Eric Stults. Meanwhile, the Dodgers were busy beating Mets starter, Steve Trachsel like a pinata at a hyperactive eight year old's birthday party.
Satisfied that the odor posed no danger to the citizenry of Queens, other than the Met fans in attendance at Shea. Before departing, the authorities confiscated an ice chest of beer from the Mets loccker room and returned to their stations.
--RD for CP sports
Well, someone has to be POTG for this afternoons stinking game. All that's left for a prize in the locker room was a lone, old can of Strohs Light that the equipment manager found lying behind the laundry cart. 
Like the team this afternoon, it's probably flat.
*Edited to fix score as pointed out below by Scarlett.