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CPF Parody Challenge: Rd #1: TransMonk vs. Yancy Street Gang

Yancy or TM?

TransMonk	16 votes
Yancy Street Gang	3 votes

TransMonk Jan 10 2007 11:35 PM

Song: “The Wreck of a Cokehead Named Darryl” Subject: Darryl Strawberry A Parody Of: [url=http://www.cancerrecords.com/Wreck.mp3]“The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald” by Gordon Lightfoot[/url] ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ When I was a lad, watching ballgames with Dad There was one man who always would thrill me The man, it was said, never gave what he had And the end of his prime came too early With a six foot six frame, he had a fruit for a name Made my ten year old eyes fill with wonder He would waggle his stick, with a big high leg kick When he came to the plate to swing lumber The man was the pride of New York at the time Some called him the coming of Williams To me he was Straw and he filled me with awe As the team played their championship season Kid, Mookie and Doc, Lenny, Mex and the lot Gave me plenty of reasons for cheering But at the end of the day in the bed where I lay It was always of Straw I'd be dreaming Great play brought him fame at a very young age And his teammates accused him of loafing Soon every man knew, just as I began to That through Straw's career he was coasting I rooted through thick and I rooted through thin Though my interest in baseball was waning There were girls, there were cars, later music and bars And this boy a man was replacing Free agent time came and Straw left for LA Saying, "New York, it's nice to have known ya" I guess I lost touch, never thought of him much Until news of his troubles had shown up He started to shout and LA kicked him out His career and and his life were in peril And later that year I realized through tears Came the wreck of a cokehead named Darryl Does anyone know where the love of God goes When our heroes turn out to be faded I was sure he'd have made the grand Hall of Fame If he wasn't so worn out and jaded By late ninety-six I was back in the mix My passion with baseball rekindled With the help of the net, I could follow the Mets But my love for Strawberry did dwindle Straw did what he could playing in the Northwoods And later he signed with the Yankees He won a few rings with the dynasty teams But he never could play like the old days In the years since then he found trouble again As he shuffled between jail and rehab He struggled with pills and tried to get well From a battle with cancer that he had I miss the old Straw when he stood great and tall With the sweetest swing in the majors When he hit home runs and touched every one When he was my hero named Darryl When I was a lad, watching ballgames with Dad There was one man who always would thrill me The man, it was said, never gave what he had And the end of his prime came too early

Johnny Dickshot Jan 11 2007 05:59 AM

outtahere

Edgy DC Jan 11 2007 06:05 AM

Second Gordon Lightfoot reference in two days. Things are looking up in Crane Poolery.

Benjamin Grimm Jan 11 2007 06:11 AM

Hmmm. I may be in trouble. Oh well, here goes... You Don't Mess Around With Dude If Jim Croce was in Pittsburgh on June 30, 1978, he would have written this song... The Reds got Charlie Hustle The Bucs got Scrap I-ron And New York Mets got ol' John Stearns He's a hard-nosed son of a gun Yeah, he's rough and tough as a man can come And more gutsy than Crazy Horse And when the All-Stars all get together in Ju-ly They oughta call Bad Dude boss Just because And they say... You don't run on to the field You don't throw at his teammate's head You don't dance around like Chief Noc-a-homa And you don't mess around with Dude Well standin' on third is a Cobra boy He said, "I'm gonna come and tie this score Get ready for a shocker, my name's Dave Parker I can charge home like a wild boar And I'm starin' down the Dude in the catcher's gear Has a big puffy glove and a mask Last inning he hit a double, now he's gonna have trouble 'Cause I'm gonna knock him on his ass" And everybody said, Dave, don't you know You don't run on to the field You don't throw at his teammate's head You don't dance around like Chief Noc-a-homa And you don't mess around with Dude A fly ball sailed into the outfield Big Dave he came barrelin' down the line And then the inning was done And the Mets were the winners and the big man was on his spine His cheek was broke in a hundred places And he was hurt in a couple more And you better believe you'll remember if you were watchin' When Big Dave hit the floor You don't run on to the field You don't throw at his teammate's head You don't dance around like Chief Noc-a-homa And you don't mess around with Dude You don't run on to the field You don't throw at his teammate's head You don't dance around like Chief Noc-a-homa And you don't mess around with Dude

ScarletKnight41 Jan 11 2007 06:23 AM

Great round guys - this is going to be a tough one!

Benjamin Grimm Jan 11 2007 08:00 AM

I'm getting trounced! It looks like this year, at least, I'll be able to sample the all-you-can-eat shrimp in the loser's lounge.

soupcan Jan 11 2007 08:17 AM

Its a few days old and slimy, but there's plenty of it to go around!

Benjamin Grimm Jan 11 2007 08:19 AM

Sounds like the kind of stuff I ate in Japan.

Willets Point Jan 11 2007 08:34 AM

TransMonk's song made me weep.

soupcan Jan 11 2007 08:37 AM

Pussy.

Willets Point Jan 11 2007 08:56 AM

Chicks dig a man who's not afraid to weep.

Benjamin Grimm Jan 12 2007 05:50 AM

With 23 minutes to go I'm down by ten votes. I think I need one of those "surges" we've been hearing about. Having never lost one of these before, I'm not sure how to act? Should I freak out and tell everyone to fuck off? In upper case letters, of course.

iramets Jan 12 2007 06:11 AM

Ding! Ding! Ding! TIME'S UP!!! Yancy loses! Bwahahaha! The King is dead, long live the King! now everyone can pile on me for being rude to you and you look all dignified in defeat. That's how it's done.

Benjamin Grimm Jan 12 2007 06:14 AM

I get it! You're the unidentified taunter, and I'm Saddam Hussein!

iramets Jan 12 2007 06:18 AM

Yancy Street Gang wrote: I get it! You're the unidentified taunter, and I'm Saddam Hussein! Huh. If I'd known you were that perceptive, I might have voted for you.

Johnny Dickshot Jan 12 2007 06:49 AM

I went with Monk here. The genius: Rhyming "peril" with "Darryl." I thought the John Stearns one was quality as well and told a good story, but just wasn't up to its competition.

Benjamin Grimm Jan 12 2007 06:53 AM

Thanks, Johnny, and I agree. I knew I was outclassed before I even posted my entry. If anyone needs me I'll be in the loser's lounge pigging out at the shrimp buffet.

MFS62 Jan 12 2007 07:02 AM

Where are we setting up the loser's lounge this year? On the main page, or in the Parody Forum? Save some shrimp for me. Is the beer cold yet? Later

soupcan Jan 12 2007 07:08 AM

Dude, I've been in the lounge for three days. If there's one thing I can do its take care of the refreshments The beer is ice cold.

sharpie Jan 12 2007 07:11 AM

Been 5 contests so far and none of voting was close.

Benjamin Grimm Jan 12 2007 07:11 AM

Yes, the beer is ice cold but you have to drink it out of a soup can.

soupcan Jan 12 2007 07:25 AM

Not such a bad deal.

TransMonk Jan 12 2007 03:28 PM

Yancy - I thought your song was great. The difference in quality was certainly not as the final score indicates. I would shove camera men out of the way to shake your hand. I was really close to writing "If Strawberry Were Gay" sung to the tune of Prince's Raspberry Beret. In the end, I'm glad I didn't.

Nymr83 Jan 12 2007 04:24 PM

watching that cameraman get shoved was priceless.

Benjamin Grimm Jan 13 2007 04:37 AM

Thanks, Monk! You are a gracious winner. Good luck the rest of the way. If anyone needs me, I'll be on the sidelines, the has-been with a mouth full of shrimp.