Master Index of Archived Threads


CPF Parody Challenge Round 1: seawolf17 vs holychicken

Pick a winner!

seawolf17	15 votes
holychicken	7 votes

seawolf17 Jan 22 2007 10:29 AM Edited 1 time(s), most recently on Jan 22 2007 10:53 AM

EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU, ARMANDO (to the tune of Ugly Kid Joe's "Everything About You") I hated watching Braden Looper, and I hated Sisk and Myers too; (and) I got real nervous watching Johnny -- Fran-co, and I, I, I, I’m concerned with Wagner too! But I, hate everything about you! Everything about you! And I, don't like a thing about your fastball, and I, I think your splitter sucks too, ‘Cause I don't think you know about the strike zone, no, no 'and I I I think velocity’s overrated too. CHORUS And I, get sick when you’re on the mound, even just on the bullpen mound, I, hate everything about you! Everything about you, everything about you, everything about you! Some say you’re the best thing we ever had, They might not remember all those times you were so bad, and if you think we were sad when you left town, think again 'cause we jumped up and down! SOLO Well don’t think we’re forgetting Counsell’s shot Drew, O’Neill, Preston Wilson, those Yankee walks Lieberthal, Berkman, Alou, and Benito Franco, Jordan, Surhoff, Ozzie Guillen, Jeter Javy Lopez, Tim Raines, everybody knows Liefer, Juan Pierre, even Orlando Facing Pat Burrell Made me wanna hurl Made me cry like a girl Hated every little thing about you! Everything about you, everything about I can’t watch you on the mound Tired of "Who let the dogs out?" I hate everything about. . . YOU!

holychicken Jan 22 2007 10:38 AM

Screw n’ me All of my crappy picks: Mike DeJean, Mike Maddux, Josias Manzanillo, Jay Payton, Andy Tomberlin ("Rock n' Me" by Steve Miller Band) Well I’ve been thinkin’ real hard And I’m tryin’ to write a song But my players suck in almost every way But I’ll try to use my smarts cause I know for the start I’ve got to beat that sweet seawolf, yeah. Well, I ain't superstitious And I don't get suspicious But how did I get those picks of mine? I got our prospect son, by the name of Jay Payton But he fizzled out in nearly no time My picks keep screwin' me baby My picks keep screwin' me baby My picks keep screwin' me baby My picks keep screwin' me baby I went from last year pitcher Dejean Again Mike Dejean, this year How do you write two songs about that guy? Josias Manzanillo was just 4 and 4 Racking up a total of 2 saves, yeah My picks keep screwin' me baby My picks keep screwin' me baby My picks keep screwin' me baby My picks keep screwin' me baby Baby, baby, baby Keep on screwin' Screwin' me baby Keep on a screwin' Screwin' me baby Don’t know Mike Maddux Now don’t know Tomberlin Jay, a song for you could really shine NLCS game 2 Nothing else until ‘02 When we packed up and sent you off in short time Keep on a screwin' me baby Keep on a screwin ' me baby Keep on a screwin ' me baby Keep on a screwin ' me, rockin' me, rockin' Baby, baby, baby Keep on a screwin ' me baby Keep on a screwin ' me baby Keep on a screwin ' me baby

holychicken Jan 22 2007 10:40 AM

May the best song win, seawolf. Regretably, I don't know the song you parodied, and I have to wait and listen when I get home.

sharpie Jan 22 2007 10:49 AM

There's no poll attached.

Edgy DC Jan 22 2007 10:51 AM

HolyChicken tries the time-honored college sophomore trick of writing about having nothing to write about. Worked for Virginia Woolf, right?

seawolf17 Jan 22 2007 10:53 AM

Fixed.

sharpie Jan 22 2007 11:01 AM

A question: If HolyChicken wins, then I guess he has used up all his players and can only use Seawolf's remainders. But --- if Seawolf wins -- then are all of Chicken's players used up so he doesn't get any plunder? Or do we just call it a Jay Payton song since he is mentioned the most?

Edgy DC Jan 22 2007 11:07 AM Edited 1 time(s), most recently on Jan 22 2007 11:11 AM

I was thinking the same thing. I was going to cross off the one he used first. We'll fight it out when we get there.

holychicken Jan 22 2007 11:10 AM

Oh, I didn't even consider how I screwed seawolf by using all of my picks. . .I just figured I was screwing myself. And what did you expect me to do, Edgy? Fate forced me to cheat!

Johnny Dickshot Jan 22 2007 11:17 AM

Wolfie's parody reminded me of Jeff Leifer and it all came crashing back. Went and looked up the boxscore of that game only to discover Endy Chavez started the rally with a single and Liefer's 3r-HR only tied the game. Benitez stayed in the game to give up a double to Wilkerson, who scored when (cover your ears) Rey Sanchez fielded a ball at shortstop and threw home. Piazza was charged with an error on the play and Fernando Tatis, who hit the ball wound up on 3rd. I don't remember whether Piazza's error was the recieving of the throw or perhaps, it was just late and his error was in trying to retire Tatis taking 2nd. Anyway, it ruined what would been an early season home sweep and of all the Benitez blown saves I recall this one galled me worse than many of the more "famous" ones since it was Jeff F'ing Liefer and for all the momentum we'd given away so soon. On the parodies, good work. Is the video for Ugly Kid Joe a match for the lyrics or is it a shorter version. Because though I liked the end lyrics I couldn't sing them along with that video. Jeff Leifer! [url]http://www.ultimatemets.com/gamedetail.php?gameno=6581[/url]

seawolf17 Jan 22 2007 11:26 AM

I used the real version, and took a few (okay, a lot) of liberties with rhymes in the fast part. I figured that part would make or break me this round, but there just aren't enough guys that Armando gave up game-winning hits to whose names rhyme neatly.

metsmarathon Jan 22 2007 01:25 PM

i say if chicken wins, he/she only gets seawolf's players, having burned all of his own. if seawolf wins, then he should get all of chicken's players from which to chose.

holychicken Jan 22 2007 03:07 PM

Oh shit, I really screwed up everything, didn't I. The whole Crane Pool Parody Challenge is going down in a burning wreck all because of me. . . . D'oh! It's my first day :)

metsmarathon Jan 22 2007 09:35 PM

i'm having a hard time reading the lyrics to the song. i real hard time. even ignoring the end part that i'll accept could be blamed on the video, it doesn't seem to follow very tightly. i'd also've gone with "speed" instead of "velocity". but i also have a hard time voting for chicken's song... so a reluctant vote gets cast against the smörgåsbord.

iramets Jan 23 2007 05:25 AM

I voted against both of 'em. Or at least I wanted to. Actually, "Mando" has to win, if only because of the research and effort (and agony!) involved.

Nymr83 Jan 23 2007 05:31 AM

i had to vote for the guy who followed "the rules," though it was a pretty funny attempt with a pretty lame player pool.

holychicken Jan 23 2007 10:38 AM

Looks like you win, seawolf. Congrats. Sorry for screwing you. . . .my thought was "IF I CAN'T WIN, NOBODY CAN!!!!" hehehe Goodluck. As to those who voted against me. . . you just weren't ready for my crane pool parody contest genre-busting style! That or you didn't like the fact that I cheated. . . either way :)

seawolf17 Jan 23 2007 10:42 AM

I think this was one of those first-round March Madness games that starts at 3:00 when nobody's watching and ends 55-47 and nobody looked terribly impressive. I promise I'll bring it next round.

Rockin' Doc Jan 23 2007 08:28 PM

This is on of the very few times I ever abstained from voting in one of the parody contests. I just didn't find that either of them really worked very well for me. I know that both holy chicken and seawolf and capable of better work. These parodies aren't nearly as easy to pull together as some of the fine work here on the Crane Pool often suggests. Sometimes you lock on a good concept and hit a home run, other times you never find inspiration and you whiff. I've definitely whiffed a few times in the past.