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CPF Parody Classic -- The Finals

Who Shall Wear the 2006 Heavyweight Championship Belt?

TransMonk	13 votes
Johnny Dshot	14 votes

Johnny Dickshot Feb 26 2007 07:44 AM

I don't see Monk here at the moment, so I'll post the thread and he can kick off the contest with a reply.

TransMonk Feb 26 2007 07:54 AM

Song: “Don't Throw That Bat At Me” Subject: Mike Piazza A Parody Of: [url=http://www.cancerrecords.com/Stand.mp3]“Don't Stand So Close to Me” by The Police[/url] ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Game Two is the subject Of media frenzy My showdown with Roger Is what they want to see Inside now he's throwing Two strikes, I have to swing His fastball is so close now It shreds my bat from me Don't throw, don't throw that Don't throw that bat at me Don't throw, don't throw that Don't throw that bat at me The barrel comes flying Thrown by a hot Rocket I yell out, "What's your problem?" No answer do I get Confusion, the players Off of the benches fly The game stops with tension What is it with this guy? Don't throw, don't throw that Don't throw that bat at me Don't throw, don't throw that Don't throw that bat at me Fans talk in the grandstand To guess they try and try Headlines at the newsstand A city asking, "Why?" The excuse that's given The strangest part of all The Rocket proclaimed that He thought it was the ball?!? Don't throw, don't throw that Don't throw that bat at me Don't throw, don't throw that Don't throw that bat at me Please don't throw that bat at me Please don't throw that bat at me Please don't throw that bat at me Please don't throw that bat at me

TransMonk Feb 26 2007 07:54 AM

Good luck, JD!

Johnny Dickshot Feb 26 2007 08:06 AM

Thanks, you too. START ME TONITE by Aaron Heilman & the Pink T-shirts I’m startin’ tonite – you better beware Gonna shut down the Marlins – even Juan Pierre If you’re watchin’ tonite – here’s what you’ll see: The filthiest stuff in the National League (Yeah) (You’re lookin’ all right)... I’m throwin’ with style Three up and three down and I’m not too wild (Cold night) – Hey, that cannot stop me I came up from the minors, wanna make this team Changeup to a lefty, like a fastball to his eyes Freeze him a moment – leaves ‘em paralyzed Luis Castillo, infield single in the fourth But I ain’t givin’ up no more henceforth Take me from the farm - Yo give me a try Take it from my arm - start me tonite! (You did all right) – Why thank you, Willie If Benson comes back he won’t unseat me (That’s not right) – I’m being denied? Throw a one-hitter and get tossed aside... So you’re askin’ me now - To go down, down with the bullpen crowd (If it’s all right) – Hey, that’s all right by me I’ll do some mop-up and be back, you’ll see Bullpen ain’t easy – but I’ll try to pass the time Chewing seeds with Braden Looper and the guys Why waste my talent when you’re stuck with Kaz Ishii? Come and take me where I long to be Take me to the park - go give me a try Take it from my arm - start me tonite! Take me from the cart- it’s not right (it’s not right) Take it from my arm - start me tonite! In winter ball... and in springtime I started and I did just fine But who gets sent to bullpen work but me ... yeah Every night I see these clowns Like Lima up and Soler down They had a chance while I wasted away… C’mon Willie! Take me to the park – yo give me a try Take it from my arm - start me tonite! Take it from my arm– it’s not right Take me from the cart– Start me! Start, start, start and blow me!

Edgy DC Feb 26 2007 08:20 AM

I'm the only vote for the Shot so far. I vote for the one I'd most like to see peformed. "Start Me Tonight" is that song, by gum.

soupcan Feb 26 2007 08:23 AM

I fucked up and voted the Monkey Man instead of JD. Can The Powers That Be fix that? Of course I'm a Police guy (going to the Fenway show in August!) but how can I not vote for my best friend Billy Squier?

Edgy DC Feb 26 2007 08:25 AM

I think we'll have to mentally recalculate your vote at the end of the day. Mentally, the score is now 3-2, rather than 4-1.

sharpie Feb 26 2007 08:47 AM

I don't know if vote-changing should be kosher. The old ladies in Palm Beach weren't allowed to switch their mis-votes for Buchanan.

MFS62 Feb 26 2007 09:02 AM

sharpie wrote: I don't know if vote-changing should be kosher. The old ladies in Palm Beach weren't allowed to switch their mis-votes for Buchanan. Changing would be allowed only if one of the parodies was of a Chad and Jeremy song. Later

smg58 Feb 26 2007 11:32 AM

I just tied it at 7. Oh, the drama. And it wasn't an easy choice.

ScarletKnight41 Feb 26 2007 12:06 PM

Tough call!

HahnSolo Feb 26 2007 02:30 PM

9-9. A barnburner!

Kong76 Feb 26 2007 02:43 PM

"The suspense is terrible! I hope it'll last."

cooby Feb 26 2007 07:23 PM

A tie seems only right

seawolf17 Feb 26 2007 07:41 PM

There's no tying in baseball!

sharpie Feb 27 2007 07:07 AM

All tied up with an hour to go.

Benjamin Grimm Feb 27 2007 07:34 AM

="soupcan"]I fucked up and voted the Monkey Man instead of JD. Can The Powers That Be fix that? Of course I'm a Police guy (going to the Fenway show in August!) but how can I not vote for my best friend Billy Squier? Or is it tied? If we're doing the controversial "mental adjustment" then Johnny leads 13 to 11.

soupcan Feb 27 2007 07:37 AM

I didn't want to say because I'm reluctant to attract attention to my now seemingly huge gaffe, but again, my vote was given to the Monkey Man in error. Sorry Monkey, all due respect and whatnot but I meant to click on JD's button.

sharpie Feb 27 2007 07:55 AM

I don't think the mental adjustment is permissible. I've certainly voted one way in some of these contests and then later thought I should have voted the other way. To open this up to that would lead to anarchy. Anarchy, I say!

soupcan Feb 27 2007 07:57 AM

Whatever.

TransMonk Feb 27 2007 08:41 AM

In the interest of nipping any further controversy in the bud...I hereby concede this competition to the honorable Mr. Dickshot. Soupcan did admit his error very early in the voting and while the votes have been close over the past day, Johnny D. has almost always had a slight lead with the adjustment. As it stands now, I would need 3 votes to win and 2 to tie...and after 5 parodies, the thought of writing another for a tiebreaker turns my stomach. But most of all, honestly, had I not been the author of my parody, I would have voted for Johnny's hands down. Well done JD, congratulations!

iramets Feb 27 2007 08:43 AM

But I would have voted TM instead of JD if I'd known that SC's vote would have been switched!

Kong76 Feb 27 2007 08:58 AM

I voted for TM, but I was hoping he'd move the erroneous vote. Gracious in defeat. I really like TM's song, yesterday I was picturing Piazza behind a drumset with headphones and a head mic on singing backround Pleeeeeze Donnnnnt Throwwwww That Baaaat at Meeeeee with a goofy look on his face.

Johnny Dickshot Feb 27 2007 11:52 AM

(Leaps over net) (Shakes hand) Good game man. (Spies wife and kids in stands) (pantomimes pistols shooting)

cooby Feb 27 2007 03:02 PM

Johnny Dickshot wrote: (Leaps over net) (Shakes hand) Good game man. (Spies wife and kids in stands) (pantomimes pistols shooting) Gasp! Your poor family!

Benjamin Grimm Feb 27 2007 04:41 PM

Congratulations, Johnny. When do we have the ceremony where I place the crown on your head?

G-Fafif Feb 27 2007 08:25 PM

We fully expect the Police reunion tour to be a quartet as a result.

Diamond Dad Feb 27 2007 08:27 PM

I am SO one day behind (in life)

Kong76 Feb 27 2007 08:30 PM

Maybe next year the final should be a three day voting contest.