Twenty-Three Skiddoo: José Quintana

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Edgy MD
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Twenty-Three Skiddoo: José Quintana

Post by Edgy MD » Tue Mar 14, 2023 12:19 pm

My name is José Quintana, and myself and my rib are here on a two-year deal to start some games and eat some frames. I'm not the biggest acquisition of the offseason, and I'm not the second-biggest. I'm, in fact, the third-biggest. And if you want more specificity, I'll clarify that I'm in fact the third biggest starting pitcher acquisition.

That may not be much. But don't go overlooking me like just another empty Funyuns bag blowing across the Mets' St. Lucie complex. I matter. I'm kind of the Omar Narváez of the rotation. David Peterson or Tylor Megill (or Blade Tidwell or Calvin Ziegler) may take my job at any point, possibly tomorrow, but rather than definitively rely on the notion that they're ready, the team has brought me in to stave them off as long as possible. Quintana is more or less the Colombian word for "operational redundancy."

But I'm more than that. I'm a tough mofo who brings it from the portside. I'm a person. I'm a person with a cool haircut, a sore rib, more career wins than Jacob deGrom, and seven organizations on my résumé. And I expect to make myself known before the Mets become just another one of those. While reports yesterday say I've been shut down until further notice, that hasn't been confirmed. ZiPS says I've got 1.8 WAR to distribute over 2023 and maybe more in my future.

That's one opinion. Well, actually, it's two. It's three if you count the Funyuns-bag thing, but I don't count that, so we'll call it two opinions.

What's yours?


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Johnny Lunchbucket
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Re: Twenty-Three Skiddoo: José Quintana

Post by Johnny Lunchbucket » Tue Mar 14, 2023 2:13 pm

Will make us miss Taijuan Waker
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Benjamin Grimm
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Re: Twenty-Three Skiddoo: José Quintana

Post by Benjamin Grimm » Tue Mar 14, 2023 3:01 pm

I think he'll be better than Carlos Carrasco was in 2021.
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A Boy Named Seo
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Re: Twenty-Three Skiddoo: José Quintana

Post by A Boy Named Seo » Tue Mar 14, 2023 3:22 pm

Johnny Lunchbucket wrote: Tue Mar 14, 2023 2:13 pm Will make us miss Taijuan Waker
Already is.
great googly moogly!
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metsmarathon
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Re: Twenty-Three Skiddoo: José Quintana

Post by metsmarathon » Tue Mar 14, 2023 3:42 pm

well, he won't actively make us miss taijuan walker until at least july, as he'll be out until at least then as he recovers from a bone graft on his dang rib.
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metirish
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Re: Twenty-Three Skiddoo: José Quintana

Post by metirish » Tue Mar 14, 2023 3:57 pm

As mentioned above
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batmagadanleadoff
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Re: Twenty-Three Skiddoo: José Quintana

Post by batmagadanleadoff » Tue Mar 14, 2023 4:01 pm

Double whatever they're claiming. If they're saying July -- see ya in 2024. 24 Skiddoo.
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whippoorwill
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Re: Twenty-Three Skiddoo: José Quintana

Post by whippoorwill » Tue Mar 14, 2023 6:09 pm

Will quietly revert to the back of our minds with his hurt rib and the Mets lame ass medical staff
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nymr83
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Re: Twenty-Three Skiddoo: José Quintana

Post by nymr83 » Tue Mar 14, 2023 7:18 pm

The Mets will win the 2023 world series, and Quintana will be the answer to a trivia question many years from now about a 2024 Met who was on the Mets DL and never played for the 2023 champs.
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