2023 Tabloid Cover Derby Round 4.02 DIDDLY SQUAT! vs THIS MUCH!

[Benjamin Grimm]

Vote for the cover that you prefer. Voting will run for seven days.


DIDDLY SQUAT!
New York Daily News, July 15, 2023.
Winner of Round 1.17
Winner of Round 2.04
Winner of Round 3.06




THIS MUCH!
Newsday, April 9, 2023.
Winner of Round 1.07
Winner of Round 3.03

[Johnny Lunchbucket]

DIDDLY SQUAT! best exemplifies the spirit of tabloid back covers, enough so to overcome the excellent photo in the other one.

And speaking of the other one, the headline is terrible and the win-loss record against a particular team is not even a real story in the baseball season. Even the ballplayers would deny taking a particular pleasure in playing Miami. 5 outta 6 is nice and all but a stretch to suggest its dominance. And who cares when it's 4th and 5th place teams battling? It's a false premise. Also, the lead-in to the hed is too small but in all-caps. It's a godawful mess made of a terrific picture.

[Benjamin Grimm]

DIDDLY SQUAT! best exemplifies the spirit of tabloid back covers, enough so to overcome the excellent photo in the other one.

And, of the remaining covers, I think it best symbolizes the 2023 season, for those who may include that as a voting criteria. DIDDLY SQUAT! has my vote, and probably will for however long it may remain in the competition.

[bmfc1]

Excuse me. Election interference! You are an impartial observer.

"This Much" is a great headline as it is written to match the joy shown in the photo.
"Squat" is about taking a dump. We've never said that the cover must mirror the season although you can vote that way if you see fit (as you said). To me, a cover about pooping is not TCD-worthy. What's next? A picture of Mendoza with his hand below his belt and the caption, "The Mets Are Pissed"?

[Edgy MD]

I will not let a eighth-grade boys' poo-poo pun win this thing. I will raze the temple before I let this come to pass.

Or, I'll just vote for "THIS MUCH!"

[Benjamin Grimm]

Well, he's squatting, not pooping. The two aren't synonymous. Catchers don't poop their pants every time they squat, do they?

Wait... DO THEY????

[Johnny Lunchbucket]

Excuse me. Election interference! You are an impartial observer.

"This Much" is a great headline as it is written to match the joy shown in the photo.

It's written to match the photo but because its pushing some false narrative that beating the Marlins is somehow more significant to the Mets than beating any other team. Is it really though? There is probably a million other headlines Newsday could have written to accompany the photo (EDUARD-OH! THE RIGHT TO BEAR ARMS! etc) but none of them would be so insipid and ham-handed as to make it about the season's record against the Marlins.

That text on the side "Make it 5 of 6 against Fish" is all that needed to be said about that stupid coincidence.

I don't think of Diddly squat as poop but as "nothing." That's obviously the meaning the News was going for here as it's an actual match for the story of the game and not some stretch of the imagination

[Edgy MD]

Well, he's squatting, not pooping. The two aren't synonymous. Catchers don't poop their pants every time they squat, do they?

Wait... DO THEY????

It's implied to represent pooping.

It's totally implied!

PooP!

[A Boy Named Seo]

I think can be both! DIDDLY SQUAT does mean nothing, nada, zilch, as confirmed in the subheadline. Shit or shitting or taking a shit all still work if you want it to cause the Mets were shit and did jack shit in the first half, in this game in particular, and in the season.

And I fucking love McNeil's McNeil face. This cover's just better than the other.

DIDDLY SQUAT 2024!

[MFS62]

Well, he's squatting, not pooping. The two aren't synonymous. Catchers don't poop their pants every time they squat, do they?

Wait... DO THEY????

It depended on whether we were trying to catch a knuckleball.
Later

[Marshmallowmilkshake]

I love "This Much."

[A Boy Named Seo]

A lot of very smart people are saying there was a late night vote dump for THIS MUCH! It's not me saying it, but a lot of smart people are. We have this big, beautiful Jeff McNeil cover and there's no way it gets beat by that Escobar guy from Mexico or wherever he's from. Sounds like a drug dealer to me, a real bad hombre. A lot of people are saying the polls here can't be trusted. That Ben Grimm did DIDDLY SQUAT to protect our elections, just like Sleepy Joe Torre did for the Mets in '79, DIDDLY SQUAT.

[whippoorwill]

Lol

[Benjamin Grimm]

That Ben Grimm did DIDDLY SQUAT to protect our elections.

I think you're confusing me with Nikki Haley. Or Nancy Pelosi. Or somebody.

[A Boy Named Seo]

That Ben Grimm did DIDDLY SQUAT to protect our elections.

I think you're confusing me with Nikki Haley. Or Nancy Pelosi. Or somebody.

Not me, but some very fine people are.

[Benjamin Grimm]

[Johnny Lunchbucket]

Booooo